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Song Parodies -> "Slow Pan"

Original Song Title:

"Joanne"

Original Performer:

Lady Gaga

Parody Song Title:

"Slow Pan"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

You know that shot, where the camera slowly pans to reveal some variety of dramatic thing, very common. A bit too common for some people, apparently...
I can't stand this slow pan
I know what it's gonna do
Not a shock, cause the dialogue
Set it all up, it's not obtuse

Jerk, know where the reveal's goin'
Why must you hold the showin'? Show it, jerk
Jerk, obvious where it's goin'
Stop the delays, start showin', show it, jerk

I'm not hooked, want it out the way
Cause I know what will be displayed
An evil smile from the real bad guy
This whole schtick's telegraphed to shit

Jerk, know where the cam'ra's goin'
Get on with it, start showin', show it, jerk
Jerk, where it's physic'lly goin'
Is no shock, so start showin', show it, jerk

Honestly, my anger's just growin'
Because this film's just draggin' on
'Bout twenty minutes in there's been twice that
In your so-called "shocks" with the same technique, bored

Jerk, ev'ryone stuck here's knowin'
Where the shot will be goin', show it, jerk
Jerk, you're not a genius showin'
The obvious this slow, twit, show it, jerk

I'd like to say that I'm this good at working out twists, but I haven't seen enough films for the "I called it" moment to actually happen. Though I did twig on to why Captain Marvel was called "Vers" by her Kree "friends" fairly early on, though.

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