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Song Parodies -> "Every Ear's Blocked as They Caterwaul"

Original Song Title:

"Every Teardrop Is a Waterfall"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Coldplay

Parody Song Title:

"Every Ear's Blocked as They Caterwaul"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

A live band in a restaurant sounds intriguing...pity that this guy got the short end of the stick.
I've turned my music up, I got my headphones on
This band that's playin' live? Won't add to my list, stop
The volume's way too high, can't tell what key they're on
Whichever one, it's easy to tell that they're off
Even the slightest glance at the crowd would spy
Least a couple dozen people who, like I
Have turned their music up, hopin' it's on in time
To stop pain and feel fine

Ooh

I've turned my music up, I got my headphones on
Tryna create a bubble, keep out awful songs
Cause if I hear another badly done bass drop
Think my eardrums are gonna out-and-out pop
Which bastard booked this band? It's really hard to eat
When ev'ry string they snap breaks ev'ry glass to pieces
Know I should be leavin' but I can't depart
A paid-in-advance farce

They just won't stop, oh-oh-oh, they're shite
It's so rude to put me off my food
And ask if I'm surprised
Trapped in these four walls
Not alone here in my misery
Sea of blocked ears from caterwauls
Block out caterwauls, ah
Shut out caterwauls, ah-ah-ah
They don't want those caterwauls
Protect ears from
All of those caterwauls, ah-ah-ah

So are these jerks worth the tag?
High bills are such a drag
Ooh
Because they ca-a-a-a-aterwaul
They ca-a-a-a-aterwaul

Yeah!

Every ear, every ear
Every ear's blocked as they caterwaul (ooh-ooh)
Every ear, every ear (whoo-ooh)
Every ear's blocked as they caterwaul (ooh-ooh)
Every ear, every ear (whoo-ooh)
Every ear's blocked as they caterwaul
Every ear, every ear
Every ear's blocked as they caterwaul
Every ear, every ear
Every ear's blocked as they caterwaul

I know there's an episode of Kitchen Nightmares which had a similar problem and if I knew where to find the clip of Gordon reacting to the horrible feedback squeal, I'd link to it in a snap.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

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 5   1
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User Comments

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alexander's ragtag band - February 07, 2019 - Report this comment
Reminds me of how the Covington folks felt about Nathan Phillips.

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