One day I woke up and I felt this pain
I can't believe I slept on my back
Or perhaps the ten 2-for-one drafts
Either way my eyes are red and blurry

Was it that truck that hit me at noon
That hockey stick that crossed my knees
What to take
Help my hurt body
Drug stores, get my wallet

Poppin' Advil
For pain you cannot see
Takin' them little orange pills
Poppin' Advil
Ibuprofen and some codeine
I need to go get my fill

Lost a brawl, got knocked out hard
Hurt so bad and it made me bleed
Check the pockets of my pants
Popped some pills and felt pristine

If you get hit by a bat
Go to your local Walgreen's*
Comes back in an hour or two
Pop one more near the sink

Takin' Advil
When you can't have Morphine
I know the pain that it kills
Takin' Advil
It's legal unlike smoking that weed
Can't smoke em, won't give you a thrill

My friend was being such a witch
She nagged on, we were at the zoo
Wish she'd leave me alone

but she won't
Saw a lion sitting calm and cool
So I let it come out and play
It chased that girl right out of my life
but that migraine stayed

When I feel ill
Tylenol don't work for me
Taking a lot of Advil
Strawberry pills
Meds aren't meant to taste like Sprees
So I'll keep taking Advil

Takin' Advil

Poppin' Advil

Yeah
One more Advil!

Six more Advil!

slamming down that little pill