I believe that entertainment magazines will rot my brain
I believe it's a moot point, I've just bought US Weekly again
I believe Christina Aguilera is a two-bit whore
I believe we all could stand to see her with blonde hair once more
I believe Orlando Bloom should probably dump Kate Bosworth
I believe that Britney Spears has got the brains of Sleepy Smurf

I believe celebrities whine far too much—they've got it good
I believe they wouldn't act like normal people if they could
I believe they all deserve this criticism every day
I believe that they should quit if they don't like the things we say

I believe we can't control the garbage they put on TV
I believe I'll watch it even though I think that it's trashy
I believe that Michael Jackson dug his grave—guilty or not
I believe that his defense will cost his freakish ass a lot
I believe that J-Lo's every bit as bitchy as she seems
I believe the only ones who disagree are on her team

I believe celebrities whine far too much—they've got it good
I believe they wouldn't act like normal people if they could
I believe they all deserve this criticism every day
I believe that they should quit if they don't like the things we say

I believe "Return of the King" will bring me some Happiness
I believe that even skeptic critics will all be impressed
I believe that Peter Jackson isn't free from scrutiny
I believe he'll keep that ugly hair all through eternity

I believe celebrities whine far too much—they've got it good
I believe they wouldn't act like normal people if they could
I believe they all deserve this criticism every day
I believe that they should quit if they don't like the things we say

I believe celebrities whine far too much—they've got it good
I believe they wouldn't act like normal people if they could
I believe they all deserve this criticism every day
I believe that they should quit if they don't like the things we say