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Song Parodies -> "Bloodstains"

Original Song Title:

"LoveGame"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Lady Gaga

Parody Song Title:

"Bloodstains"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Imagine a man covered in blood, drippin from head to toe...and all he can say is "damn it, I just washed this coat!"
I'm drenched in blood, it's gross as shit
Don't ask me how or why cause I can't say dick
I'm caked in blood, it's gross as shit
Got things to do tonight, so this stuff can't stick
Blood!

Blood!

I'd love to (blood!) tell you
But if I did, I'd have to (blood!) kill you, mate
Point is this (blood!) detergent's useless
It's possible that I'm just clueless
Cause I (blood!) can't erase, can't erase
This bloodstain, this bloodstain (blood!)
Help me, I've bloodied
My bright white lab-coat, it's my fav'rite
Shouldn't take this damn long to scrub, it's coagulated
I'm drenched in blood, it's gross as shit
Don't ask me how or why cause I can't say dick
All of this blood just makes me sick
I've got a date tonight, I can't look like this

Erase these bloodstains, hate these bloodstains
I don't want blood on my stuff, mate
Must remove these (blood!) stains
Friggin' bloodstains
Erase (blood!) these bloodstains, hate these bloodstains
Cause who wants blood on their stuff, mate?
Can't remove these stains (blood!)
Stupid bloodstains
Blood!

Blood!

The blood's still drippin'
Look like an extra from some slasher film
I would explain how this happened
But I've got greater things happ'nin'
Like my skin's bright red, man, that's plain bad
More bloodstains, more bloodstains
Not red from scrubbin'
Ain't usin' a rough scourer, dipshit
And I haven't gone psychotic, some weird after-image
I'm caked in blood, it's gross as shit
Come on, don't pass out right on my floor, you twit (blood!)
I think you're overreactin'
It's only blood, you like horror films, don't quit (blood!)

Erase these bloodstains, hate these bloodstains
I don't want blood on my bod, mate
Must remove these (blood!) stains
Frickin' bloodstains
Erase (blood!) these bloodstains, hate these bloodstains
No-one likes blood on their bod, mate
Can't remove these stains (blood!)
Damn these bloodstains
Blood!

Blood!

Come on, please stop standi-in' there with your dumb jaw dropped
It's alright, won't come out but it's only some blood
Sure i-it is a ton, bu-ut I-I've not killed today
It's annoyin' you won't make the blood go away
They can't stay (blood!)
Cause they're lame (blood!)
Clean these stains (blood!)
These bloo-oo-oodstains

Erase these bloodstains, hate these bloodstains
Know you hate blood, but these can't stay
Must remove these (blood!) stains
All these bloodstains
Erase (blood!) these bloodstains, hate these bloodstains
Please ignore all those corpses, mate
Can't remove these stains (blood!)
Crazy bloodstains
Blood!
Erase these bloodstains, hate these bloodstains
Not the blood of any good mates
So it's all fine (blood!), 'kay (I'm drenched in blood, it's gross as shit)?
Still got bloodstains (don't ask me how or why cause I can't say dick)
Erase (blood!) these bloodstains, hate these bloodstains
Missin' the point, this blood can't stay
Can't remove these stains (blood!) (I'm caked in blood, it's gross as shit)
Don't want bloodstains (come on, don't pass out right on my floor, you twit)
Blood!
Bloody bloodstains
Blood!

I originally considered mimicking the original songs random French (dans le lovegame) by having a different foreign word for "hate" in those sections. However, I figured that wouldn't really work because it relies on everyone knowing the pronunciation for those words, so I scrapped it.

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 3   0
 1
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 4   1
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 5   6
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 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Blaydeman - February 20, 2017 - Report this comment
(Artistry) I gotta be honest here and say this did nothing for me. It got stuck in this repetitious area where you hit the same joke over and over and it didn't go anywhere for me. It just sat there like a pool of coagulated blood. I thought you nailed the choruses with your pacing. That was impressive. The verses weren't as successful though. Sometimes you completely rock topic s like this, this one was a miss though. Sorry.
Agrimorfee - February 21, 2017 - Report this comment
I am with Blaydeman 100%.
Max Power - February 21, 2017 - Report this comment
You did your best with this OS but it does get pretty bloody, not bad still.
Matthias - February 22, 2017 - Report this comment
I would have loved to say that this one was "Bloody Brilliant" but I have to say that just like in Blaydeman's parody the topic left me feeling a bit icky inside.
Abbott Skelding - February 23, 2017 - Report this comment
This might be my favorite Gaga song, but this didn't really stick with me either. I think maybe if it was about a guy who instead of being covered in blood head to toe, he just walks through life and by some weird circumstance he gets a blood stain on his jacket. I don't know, maybe?

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