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Song Parodies -> "Execution"

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The Lyrics

One's job does not dictate one's personally. For example, not every politician is a money-grabbing slimeball...or so I have read anyway ;) This parody is about another such hypothetical example: the awkward, friendly executioner. Enjoy!
Got blood beneath my fingernails
It drips upon the ground I stand upon
But I'm just an av'rage Joe
I love to laugh, sometimes I cry
I'm just sick of all of these awkward dates
Bring up my job, the girl flies
(Kinda awkward)

And I'm angry that no-one believes
That I'm pleasant as I can be
It's my day job that makes them freak
My occupation
Is execution

But I, I'm quite a jolly guy
Should work harder to hide
The blood stains
Left from my daily grind
Sure I make lots of people die
They're criminals, besides
I'm really good with knots, that's no lie

Just cause I've hung a lot of dudes
Doesn't mean I love to see the blood fly
Sorry for dripping blood on you
(I'll clean that mess)
Sure, I've snapped my fair share of bones
I may have put people's spleens in a jar
But I'm an honest, upright guy
(Love a good jest)

No, your skin I don't want to flay
I will not bring work home, no way
This black cap doesn't mean I'm deranged
This execution
My occupation

But I, I'm quite the funny guy
I'm not a freak, no lie
Baby, please
Please don't pass out this time
This guy, took way too long to die
That's why I'm late, that's right
This job is killing my social life

I don't lurk around
Killing random guys
I don't lurch around
Slaughtering young guys
I just walk around
Eat food by the pound
Lots of booze, I'll down
Won't kill random guys
It's gotten around
That I walk 'round town
Killing random guys
My job in this town
Given by the crown
Is to kill bad guys
When I'm told to, pow

I, I am a stand-up guy
There's no dark beast inside
Just me here
With a shitty job, mind
Yes I, don't like my daily grind
Chopping the heads off guys
Who did bad things, I'm not a bad guy

I am not a creepy guy

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

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Meriadoc - October 26, 2012 - Report this comment
Clever idea as yours always are, with great droll lines ("I'll clean that mess").
Agrimorfee - November 09, 2012 - Report this comment
Good rhymings on the choruses. I wanted to know more about this guy...does he get health benefits and stock options? Did he ever have to go home for an emergency and leave a project, um, unfinished? After a serf uprising, does he get time and a half?
Matthias - November 17, 2012 - Report this comment
This would make a pretty awesome cartoon or a 60s TV sitcom! I love how it worked so well with KoRn's music in the background. Just a really good parody!
Rex - November 18, 2012 - Report this comment
This made me think of the executioner from Blazing Saddles. Fun idea!
Below Average Dave - November 23, 2012 - Report this comment
Alrighty. . .that was certainly unique

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