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Song Parodies -> "Hook's Croc"

Original Song Title:

"Tik Tok"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Ke$ha

Parody Song Title:

"Hook's Croc"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "Don't Stop The Pop" self-challenge. Holy butts, last one, y'all! Here's Peter Pan being a complete dick (as he originally was before Disney got their hands on him). Enjoy!
My name's Peter Pan, but you can call me Petey
(Wendy's my girl)
And if there's one thing I abhor
It's pirates stealin' booty (oh noes!)
You know that Hook is a crook
But he's still quite the sap
Whether it's day or the night
He ain't stealin' jack

His crewmen are all a bunch of schmoes-schmoes
Us kids are their worst foes-foes
And somethin' you should know-know
Tick-tock, it's time for Hook to get antsy
Crocodile joins the party
And he wants his Captain Hook nibblies

That croc, near the docks
Hook, your pants are fillin' up
Too frightened to fight
See you in a few nights
Tick tock, here comes Croc
And he's bitin' Hook's butt, yo
Ow-wow-wow ow!
Ow-wow-wow ow!

Go croc, stop his plot
I forget just what it was
He bites, such a sight
Hungry look in his eyes
Tick tock, there goes Croc
Chasin' after Hook's butt, yo
Ow-wow-wow ow!
Ow-wow-wow ow!

See, Neverland is MY world
Captain Hook should just steer
Away from it before that crocodile bites him in the rear
At first the Lost Boys didn't care
Thought Wendy was a nagger
But they're havin' second thoughts
Cause Hook had to go and snag her

You're kiddin' me, how can he be this dumb-dumb
Or simply blitzed on rum-rum
But he hasn't beat me yet, no, not once-once
In-in the pirate world he has no clout-clout
Cause flying kids keep him down-down
May have a mean frown-frown
But-but he's a clown

I'll stop, his dumb plot
He should know it's gonna flop
I'm right, this is trite
All I need's fairy flight
Tick tock, comes the croc
I wish that we had popcorn
Ow-wow-wow ow!
Ow-wow-wow ow!

Hook sucks, know that much
And that Smee's an utter schmuck
Each night, I take flight
In my cap and green tights
Tick tock, hear that clock?
Biting Hook on the butt, yo
Ow-wow-wow ow!
Ow-wow-wow ow!

Captain Hook cracks me up
I knock him down
Too tightly wound
Like the clock is
Inside that croc
I hear him now
Hook won't be round
For a few weeks

Hook always messes up
And faffs about
When I come 'round
Tries to kill me
He won't catch up
Cause I'll fly up
And kick his butt

And the fight always stops when Croc swims in

Croc snaps, wants a snack
Hook's way too scared to attack
Can't fight, petrified
Of reptilian bites
Tick tock, here comes Croc
To finish what he started
Ow-wow-wow ow!
Ow-wow-wow ow!

Hook's off, like a shot
John and Michael laugh a lot
Oh my, what a sight
With his eyeballs so wide
Tick tock, there goes croc
Snapping at that crook's butt, yo
Ow-wow-wow ow!
Ow-wow-wow ow!

Never smile at a crocodile, now I'm off to parody the top 25 songs of 2009...

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   2
 2
 2
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Abbott Skelding - June 24, 2014 - Report this comment
Not bad. Some details were lost on me because I've actually never seen (or read) Peter Pan...but I knew enough references to get it. Pacing seemed a tad off in some places, but I'll chalk that up to Ke$ha weird singing. Nice work!
Agrimorfee - June 26, 2014 - Report this comment
I got pacing blips here and there, too. But still, nicely done.
Blaydeman - July 04, 2014 - Report this comment
(ABC) I also had a few pacing issues, it's a decent parody, but didn't deliver nearly as many laughs as I've become accustomed to when reading your work.
Matthias - July 05, 2014 - Report this comment
Take this first five to the right and straight on till morning! Great parody here man! A little jumbled but not bad at all.

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