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Song Parodies -> "Childish Rapper"

Original Song Title:

"Marshall Mathers"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Eminem

Parody Song Title:

"Childish Rapper"

Parody Written by:

Below Average Dave

The Lyrics

My main purpose of writing this one was because of it's Anti-Gay Rhetoric throughout without him even realizing or caring that it's offensive. This one is poking fun at this particular song and others like it by Eminem. In a lot of his big hits he's much more fun and poking fun at other people, if he'd stay away from the hateful stuff, I actually think he lyrically one of the most talented performers I've ever heard, if he'd stick to the fun and stay away from the whole hateful act, I wouldn't be compelled to write this. I'm at badave.com
Yo Man, I just like swearing
Make fun of ev'rybody
Screaming 'bout my failures
Now when somebody wants to cuss back at me
Heh, I'll get all damn whiny, Hear me holla?
Lyric'lly kick your rear

You see I'm, a Childish Rapper (Childish Rapper)
Shout cuss words real high,
I make fun of anyone who's not like me (who's not like me)
I like to call my mom a whore,
and insult my daddy (insult daddy)
I guess that's ok if it sells
to go hate your fam'ly (hate your fam'ly)

Bro, you will hear me yellin', but nothin' compellin'
That you'll hear me beltin' 'Cause they pay me a wad
To show my bod off and embark, that's right just dollars
hollerin 'bout people wastin' my talent on hate sparkin'
Say my mom pops pills now, then wearing plastic buns
I just love to mock and take little lame azz knocks at
Michael Jackson's "Thriller", My hate's meticulous
Angers bad, and parents scream, it's part of the biz
Love to use words like gay fifteen times in 12 seconds
Ticked off, cause I am a Homophobic sis
My hate has no limitations, just kick all them
I'm no scholar but I'm teaching kids how to act vi'lent
Now I'll list why I'm pissed those who insist pop songs
I have some hits that are fun and not cautious
"I ain't no role model" but ask "Hey Kids Do You Like Vi'lence?"
Releasin' hits, but hope those I dis are silent ("Damn Posse!")
I've got these raps down to a science
but instead I scream 'bout dead, Not for faint hearted
Jealous of those who aren't me and my hate charted
Think this is Art kid? Giving your hair that blond color
All I've got is vile words in my songs piling
He wants to know why cryin's out and so is violence
Cause that craps simple and and it lacks compassion
rationalize cuss-spitting and glamorize hate, evil, and bank robbing
**sing**
Green Day hit the top, so I'll call them chicks
Those who aren't me make me sick
And now I'll use another "beeped" out word and shout it
Like I own it (hahaha)
**back to rap**
I make fun of dudes like Moby (uh-uh)
Take shots at Will Smith and Britney (yup)
and piss people off hoping tweens will like me (hehe)
A bunch of people from the F.C.C. said ban me
and the G.L.B.T. said that they all hate me
So I performed with Elton John, truth unfurls
that I really do not hate all those I give these words
But through all the years, I said "queer",
this bigot said gay's stay out of here
and expect gays not to take offense, dear?
Burn it up, or toss away
Making no points, as I shroud myself in hypocrisy (I'm a punk)
And my tongue's evil, It spouts out more than I can pronounce
Half the friggin time I don't even know what this hate is about
I always flip out when someone insults me and I lash out
(AHHH!) I frown and I cuss all in my next hit, blaow!
Back in court for runnin' my trap again
Admitted it was all a game in that big hit "Stan"
My image is frail, if in jail, you know that I would fail
so wake up, so no one, tries to mess with my sales
I'm famous, and ignoramus
My lyrics chucking out rhymes the repeat all that I'm saying

Cause I'm a Childish Rapper (Childish Rapper)
I'm an A-Hole of a guy
I'll run my mouth if you do not like me (do not like me)
I can be mean and sing to beats
while I take shots a thee (take shots at thee)
And I even took a stab at Weird Al
after I said yes to parody (to parody)

Is it because I'm famous that I'm supposed to act like this
I don't raise your kids, so don't buy me, I've warned thee
Now that I like to knock cops and dis pops
y'all say my sales will drop, They won't stop
My killer sounds you'll come around and I will get busy
Don't you all miss me and you all will forgive me
Yeah, my rap rhymes make you dizzy
I can act just like a pig and call everyone else big ol' sissies
My records sell well over a damn billion
And I earn it with all of this skill that Dre's sellin'
Man, it takes a lot to hate for five minutes
Leave a line for each and every person who sued, that'll fill it
Well I'll get rich, "Slim Shady Please Stand Up"
And fill the rest of my album with wannabe hate junk
Secretly I think law suits are a blast
It gives me something to whine about when my mind passes gas (Uhh!)
So help me, spread all the crap that I spew
For every album I make, an arch rival or two
Pissing on Britney, N'Sync, Christina and Manson to make some dollars
Wouldn't you know, They've got lots of followers (Hey, they're fans!)
Those who I'm dissing I've ain't heard their C.D's
or even thought about trying to be friends with their peeps
Cause really I just like to be loud
Building crowds who protest me 'long side their spouse
Hey! When I got big, took advantage of my demand
Started selling out to advertisers for some more grands
I don't act my age, making cash
Can't you all see? You pay for all my big car's gas
Okay, I'll strip my shirt to sell posters as well
uhh, there - Don't I look swell? Don't I look swell?
Now if only maybe I could go and laugh at my self
Ahh screw it, People might leave my crap on the shelf

Cause I'm a Childish Rapper (Childish Rapper)
I'm just a homophobe guy
At least I act like it when cameras on me (cameras on me)
Acting like I am all hardcore
Shouting obscenities (obscenities)
Now I am gonna go improve my health
to make ya'll stare at me (just stare at me)

(BAD takes over)

Because he's a Childish Rapper (Childish Rapper)
I hope he sees this as a joke,
and that he doesn't kill me (doesn't kill me)
Outside of his hateful stuff
I love all his fun energy (fun energy)
And I know he doesn't really hate
all the people he decrees (that he decrees)
This has been a Below Average Dave Production, All Rights Reserved.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   4
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 5   9
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - July 17, 2008 - Report this comment
You're going to piss off a lot of Eminem fans, but at least you can back up all of this hate for Eminem with proof. This looks like it was a complete biz-natch to write, so I give you mad props for completing it, and not only completing it, but doing a complete bang up job with it. Fantastic hate job here!
AFW - July 17, 2008 - Report this comment
Excellent job....of rap rewording...
The Judge - August 16, 2008 - Report this comment
I'm one of the biggest Eminem fans around, but still, these lyrics were funny as hell, and yeah, they are mostly true. However, isn't it Eminem's flaws that makes us love his advantages?
Rocky Mak - September 07, 2008 - Report this comment
I'm currently doing a parody of this song because I've already done parodies for almost every position in the American football field. I'm stuck though.
Below Average Dave - September 08, 2008 - Report this comment
I've taken on a number of songs that most consider insane to attempt, this particular one is a very hateful original, so hateful that it makes it hard to parody without being angry--but I would think that in an offensive position of any type, that might work. . .but sports parodies to a song of this magnitude would be tough--good luck buddy.
Matthias - April 01, 2009 - Report this comment
Lots and lots of deserved hate spewed in this one Dave. At least when you hate something or someone it's for a good reason, so I guess that doesn't make you racist...
kevin - April 02, 2009 - Report this comment
im a big eminem fan and you captured his sstyle and complete opposites. very well done on a tough write 5's yourself
Agrimorfee - April 02, 2009 - Report this comment
(abc) Regret not having read this before...very MADtv worthy satire, on top of doing Eminem which is of the highest difficulty. Good job.
bobpiecheese - April 10, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) Some of this seems a bit nasty to me, although I can see where you're coming from. I'm conflicted on this one, I'm afraid. I'll just vote 555 for the hell of it.
Below Average Dave - April 10, 2009 - Report this comment
If you by nasty you mean--mean---his OS is what creates such nastiness, if by nasty you mean gross, unfortunately bud, this song is all about Eminem. .it's all based on on stuff he's done.
Arwen - April 10, 2009 - Report this comment
ABC...HOLY CRAP. I don't even have words for this, Dave...it's just ridiculous...as in good...and as in difficulty...I can't even say enough. And way to skewer such a lover of skewering...=)
Red Ant - April 11, 2009 - Report this comment
Damn... kick ass parody of a hard OS, great rhymes and pacing, and OTM satire. Favorite line was : "hear me yellin', but nothin' compellin'" LOL. 555+
Jeff Reuben - April 11, 2009 - Report this comment
ABC: Wow, tough song! Funny stuff, you did this well!
Melanie Lee - April 11, 2009 - Report this comment
Wow! A lot of work, a lot of thought. Hard for me to follow, but I found a few more laughs when I read it a second time. 5-4-5.

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