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Song Parodies -> "Fake I.D."

Original Song Title:

"Without Me"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Eminem

Parody Song Title:

"Fake I.D."

Parody Written by:

Charlie Decker

The Lyrics

My highly exaggerated guidebook to the ancient art of underage drinking. Bottoms up!
Miller Lite! Great taste, less filling...

Two underage girls find booze hard to find
Booze hard to find, booze hard to find
Two underage girls find booze hard to find
Booze hard to find, booze hard to find

Guess who's back, back again
Charlie's back, tell a friend
Guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, I don't slack, not a quack,
More like Spaff, if he's jacked up on crack

I've become a teenager
And nobody wants to drink Pepsi no more, they want to get crunked up quicker
Well if you want a buzz this is what I'll give ya
A little too much beer followed by hard liquor
A combo that'll make you so much sicker
Than the flu when the green goo comes from your body
And you're barfing, your gut's not cooperating
And in two minutes you want to be copulating! (Hey!)
This liquor store clerk is player-hating
I just want liquid courage to help my mating
"I know that I look 15, my damie,
But this thyroid gland problem is complicated!"
So the FAA won't let me play
They make me obey, so let me say
They let me smoke cigars, fight wars, you see
But for beer I need a fake I.D.
So, chug-a-lug, chuggin' a drug
Done that, think I'm in love, or maybe just buzzed
And I'm ready, and this thing might get hot and heavy
I just threw up on your new dress, sorry Debbie!

Now this looks like a dead party
So everybody, chip in 'cause we
Are gonna give it some new spiked I.V.
But I'm gonna need a fake I.D.
I said this is a problem for me
So everybody, just follow me
And my name will soon be Brian Magee
'Cause I'm gonna need a fake I.D.

Little hellions, kids feeling rebellious
Embarrassed they're still sober Saturday night, since
They're still looking for someone to sell this
A fake I.D. so they can yell at the bouncer, "Bitch!"
They say "take care," say, "drinking is scary"
Could start a revolution, leading the youth astray
I'm sober, but just let me revel and bask
In the fact that I just got my new I.D. back
But it's a disaster, it's far too thin, indeed
And it's too small, it's about the size of a stamp, you see
And I'm black, na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na
And the photo is white, gave me a fright now I just might
Reutrn it but the shop windows have been boarded
Been shut down by the po-po for being sordid
Now I'm arrested; my breath has been tested
Molested when I tried to protest it
"Walk in a straight line, sir!"
Really could but it's zigzags that I prefer
Where's my phone call? I need, officer
Need my mom, come on, please send for her!

Now this looks like a dead party
So everybody, chip in 'cause we
Are gonna give it some new spiked I.V.
But I'm gonna need a fake I.D.
I said this is a problem for me
So everybody, just follow me
And my name will soon be Brian Magee
'Cause I'm gonna need a fake I.D.

Detox it, hawk and spit, I'll go shot for shot wit
Anyone who wants to drink hops 'n' toxins
Grey Goose Vodka? It can getcha hopped up
Worse than those little Budweiser frogs, and
Bacardi? You could get drunk by Charlie!
You ambriosa of Gods - a woman's drink? Hardly!
Hops and barley, brewed ice cold, served fresh
It's heaven, but nothing beats a fine Merlot
Don't gulp, no, these things must be savored
And impart on your taste buds oodles of flavor
I've drank swill, but now I've gotten smarter
Ever since I tried beer brewed by Billy Carter
But sometimes all a guy needs
A liquor that will bring him down to his knees
Like absinthe if you're overseas
But locally beer it will be
Though I'm not the first Duke of drunken stupors
I am the worst dude since George Bush Junior
To guzzle brew so haphazardly
Then get behind the wheel and party! (Hey!)
Here's a concept that works
A generation of drunk jerks emerge
But in order to fufil this prophesy
We are going to need some fake I.D.s

Now this looks like a dead party
So everybody, chip in 'cause we
Are gonna give it some new spiked I.V.
But I'm gonna need a fake I.D.
I said this is a problem for me
So everybody, just follow me
And my name will soon be Brian Magee
'Cause I'm gonna need a fake I.D.

This song is over,
I'm getting sober,
it's time to mope, sure
And clutch my head

This song is over,
I'm getting sober,
it's time to mope, sure
And clutch my head

Kids!
Leave me comments; it's the only way I'll ever learn

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 1
 0
 
 4   2
 2
 1
 
 5   17
 16
 18
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Kristof Robertson - April 04, 2005 - Report this comment
I usually steer clear of rap parodies, Charlie...but this one caught my attention. Really, really good work. 555
Rex - April 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Anyone who remembers Billy Beer deserves a rating of 5 cans. Now excuse me while I go have a Newcastle Brown.
Oops! - April 04, 2005 - Report this comment
"FAA" should be "FDA"
Dumb Ass Kid - April 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Who am I to argue? 555
Dee Range - April 04, 2005 - Report this comment
I don't do rap either...it's mostly crap without the C, IMO... but this is a funny read...loved the "Duke of drunken stupors" line. Now that I CAN relate to! 555
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - April 04, 2005 - Report this comment
101 days, 11 hours, 49 minutes mileage to go on my Fake ID (I used in order to be rebellious and vote in the last election.) Your rap parody skills are breathing down my neck, Charlie. Stop NOW. 555
Charlie Decker - April 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Breathing down your neck or not, I still think I have a little ways to go to catch up to "Devout Me" (seriously. That's some good stuff). Also, I'm glad that some people are checking in on this one, even if they hate rap. Does this mean I have some *gasp* fans?! Nah, they probably wandered in here thinking I was parodying U2's "A Day Without Me"
Red Ant - April 05, 2005 - Report this comment
LOL, your fake ID says you were born in May of 1955. Rap is good PROVIDED one can understand the words ( and in this case you can ).
Marshall Mathers - April 16, 2005 - Report this comment
please stop making fun of my music
Red Ant - May 03, 2005 - Report this comment
( SOTM ) Already voted.
Dumb Ass Kid - May 07, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Already voted as well. really good
Agrimorfee - May 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Damn good Em rap--yes , Luke should worry. I was a little confused about what was going on in the 2nd verse, because it sounded like your narrator got busted, but then the 3rd verse sounds like he hasn't tried to buy anything yet.
Scathe - May 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Any of this based on personal experience, Mr. Decker.
Rick C - May 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Good job, Charlie! 555
Jeff Reuben - May 11, 2005 - Report this comment
I was about to comment on the FAA, but someone already caught that. You picked an Eminem song I know...some very good lines, some I wasn't sure of the pacing, but I'd have to check back to the original (which is conveniently in my car right now). This will probably score better with the high school/college crowd than an older crowd...that's your crowd, so that's a good thing for you! Alcohol songs always score well with me =)
Dee Range - May 11, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM...already voted and commented
Adagio - May 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(2005-D) DKTOS, but a good read.
Adagio - May 13, 2005 - Report this comment
Oops, I mean (ABC05-F).
Guy - May 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-F) DKTOS but judging by the positive comments I feel I missed out on something really good by not knowing the OS.
Arwen - May 13, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM--as much Eminem as I've listened to, these parodies always kill me...I ALWAYS get lost...(my fault, not yours)...this is funny, though!!
Guy - May 14, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above comments.
Melhi - May 16, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Well, you had me fooled for a long time! ;) Great job... (Have to admit I cheated and had one of my kids go over it for pacing.)
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - May 17, 2005 - Report this comment
I'll forward my usual advice to (school) kids your age: Don't drink and derive!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - May 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Had to admit I cheated and got my mum go over it for pacing. Still great!
Red Ant - May 19, 2005 - Report this comment
( ABC-F 05 ) Read/commented.
Rex - May 21, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Commented above.
Johnny D - May 22, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) "And I'm black ... And the photo is white" ... LOL !!!
Rick C - May 25, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-F '05) Already commented above.
Johnny D - May 26, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above!
Spaff.com - May 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Have to admit I cheated and used the MP3 for pacing. Wow. A grundle of great subs and gags. My faves: "in love or just buzzed," "sorry Debbie," and "it's zigzags that I prefer," plus the name-checking of Billy Carter, Dubya, Homer Simpson (anybody else catch that?), and, um, me. (I've been Paul Robinsoned!) Charlie's back, indeed.
Stuart McArthur - May 28, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) OVRTOS - only vaguley recall the OS, but there's no doubting the skill involved here, Charlie - and I liked the comic gems like "Ever since I tried beer brewed by Billy Carter" - LOL!
Claude Prez - May 29, 2005 - Report this comment
"When I was seventeen, I drank some very good beer..." I should've known Spaff would beat me to the Brian Magee reference. Just one of many clever clever lines. Very skillful.
Kristof Robertson - May 30, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Still like this alot....
Rex - May 30, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC - F) See above.
Phil Alexander - May 30, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM-F (er... ???) DKTOS, but enjoyed the read :-)
Melhi - May 31, 2005 - Report this comment
(F) See above. :)
2nz - June 01, 2005 - Report this comment
This is a great and skill-ful work, Charlie. I can't believe I didn't get the 'Brian McGee' reference until I read Spaff's comment. Props for all the obvious work you put into this. Fave sections:

"I just want liquid courage to help my mating"
and
"This song is over,
I'm getting sober"
Agrimorfee - June 01, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) see above
MysteryGoat - June 01, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I can appreciate the difficulty of parodying a rap song, nicely done.
Charlie Decker - June 03, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks to all of you, but particularly to Spaff for pointing out all of the references that I was afraid people had missed. Also, thanks to many of you for reading it twice for two different contests!
Rick C - June 04, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) See above.
MysteryGoat - June 05, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Even better the second time.
Jeff Reuben - June 05, 2005 - Report this comment
AB C-above!
Kristof Robertson - June 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Still the best rap parody I've read in a long time
ABC's OF PARODIES ROUND "F" BRONZE MEDAL - June 07, 2005 - Report this comment
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=3010.0;id=6171;image
martha - June 08, 2005 - Report this comment
A veritable tour de force!! brilliant
Tim Mayfield - June 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Late comment due to Firefox and lack of sleep (I guess).. Great stuff, I think this one is very good.

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