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Song Parodies -> "Band-Aid"

Original Song Title:

"Bad Day"

Original Performer:

Daniel Powter

Parody Song Title:

"Band-Aid"

Parody Written by:

Spaff.com

The Lyrics

Where are my guts when I need 'em the most?
A bee stung my arm and I'm white as a ghost
I scraped up my knee; I'm such a klutz
And nothing hurts more than paper cuts
But Band-Aids always fix them all

I played with your thresher down on the farm
It caught on my sleeve and it tore off my arm
You told me your pit bulls were polite
You told me your gators didn't bite
But oops they chewed my kneecaps off

Do you have a Band-Aid?
It's just what I need
To patch up these spots
Where my bullet holes bleed
And one for each cheek
I caught on barbed wire
And third-degree burns
From my hair catching fire
I need a Band-Aid
I'm sure it will heal
My leg that got crushed
By your automobile
I caught a grenade:

I need a Band-Aid

The trick is to clench your *teeth* and grin
I might need a couple *as*-pirin
And maybe rubbing alcohol...

D'ya have a Band-Aid?
To put on this scratch
I sat on a mine
And my butt came detached
My parachute broke
I crashed on my back
My liver popped out
And I can't put it back
I need a Band-Aid
To stick to this place
Where hammerhead sharks
Came and bit off my face
I need a Band-Aid
(Ooh...)

Sometimes you're faced with life's little scrapes
Or a slight dermal injur-y
When *I* get booboos, *I* smile and sing
I'm stuck on Band-Aids, *'cause* you see
They're stuck on me
(Yeah...)

So where are my guts when I need 'em the most?
(Oh where'd they go...)
They all got poked out; I'm impaled on a post

Do you have a Band-Aid?
The anti-germ kind?
To stick on these limbs
That I'm leaving behind
I might need one more
I just realized
Those alien squids
Must have sucked out my eyes
I need a Band-Aid
To unbreak my spine
My head just fell off
One more time
But I'll be okay:

You have a Band-Aid

(Ahhh...)
(You have a Band-Aid...)
(c) 2006+ Spaff Day

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 45

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 3
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 1
 
 3   1
 2
 0
 
 4   9
 2
 5
 
 5   33
 38
 37
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

DKTOS? - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Don't Know The Original Song? It's temporarily available at www.spaff.com/dktos
Phil Alexander - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
You had a bad day
It make me feel sad
But stop bleatin' on
Like it's so ****ing bad
But I bet your bad day
Was no worse than mine
Put it in a song:
'Cause it's parody time...
You had a bad day
And it's makin' me laff
I guess that's just typic-
Al of you, Spaff... ;-)
Arwen - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Nice, Spaff. I think I'm the only around the site who isn't annoyed by Mr. Powter...(I totally dig the CD, I'm sorry!)...but I HAVE to give kudos to this one, because if you take out the alien squid, I've been through everything else in the song...; )

I had about 50 favorite lines...but the thresher bit holds a pretty special place in my heart...
Ethan Mawyer - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Spaff, I wanted to do Bad Day-Band-Aid months ago, but I never thought of much good material to support the basic idea. You, obviously didn't have the same problm and if you did you got over it.
alvin rhodes - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
hilarious
Claude Prez - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
As a mailman, I have to say the Pit Bull line in particular struck a nerve. But the whole thing is great, as usual. And as a bonus, I can stop thinking about doing "I Used A Bidet".
Phil Alexander - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Claude- ISTM that you should write:
I had a bidet
But I am not sure
Precisely what
You use the thing for...
Ravyn Rant - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Geez, do you have to be so freakin good ALL THE TIME?! :) I had to put my lunch away before I could read this - I'm the only one on this floor that knows the Heimlich maneuver. 555
Claude Prez - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Hey, I like that Phil. How about: Where is the roll when you need it the most? Heh heh -- I bet Spaff has always wanted someone to write a toilet parody in his comment section.
Phil Alexander - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
I had a bidet
Don't mean to be gross
But where is the roll
When you need it the most?
It's in the bidet
It got soaking wet
I wonder how much more
Sick can it get...

Can I leave you to fill in the verses, Claude? I'd do it myself, but it would mean I'd have to listen to the bloody song...

...PS Sorry, Spaff, for hijacking your comments thread :-)
Anny - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Great job, Spaff. Hilarious parody to describe a day that was "a pain". 555. :D
Rex - June 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Read this and after I finished laughing, realized it reminded me of another song I had heard years ago. I racked my brain for two days to finally remember "I Think I'll Need a Bandaid" by Trout Fishing in America (and now I can't get my brain off that frikkin' rack). Anyway, greatness as usual, and you are right on about bandaids -- when I was young I got hit with a thermonuclear bomb and there was nothing left of me but a small piece of my left pinkie -- but a bandaid fixed me right up.
Cat - June 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Heh heh...great sendup (as usual) of a profoundly annoying song, Spaff. TMGLTM but "My butt came detached" especially stood out for me. And is it just me or am I the only one who has a conspiracy theory that Daniel Powter and James Blunt are the same person?
Michael Pacholek - June 10, 2006 - Report this comment
I know a good place to stick a Band-Aid: Daniel Powter's mouth! I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Arwen's the only pouter we need around here. This OS isn't quite up there (down there?) with the Blunt instrument's song yet, but any time I see a parody about it, it can't be a bad day!
Spaff.com - June 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanx, e.e. rhodes & Anny & Michaelopedia!

Sister Evenstar: This horribly ubiquitous Daniel Powter song is the only one of his I've heard, but this isn't the first time I've heard that the album is good. I'll just take your word for it.

E-Thang: Well, I didn't expect a pop-in from YOU. Where ya been? And sorry to usurp your idea.

Rantyn Rave: I was about to reply with a really bad "Heimlich" joke. Be glad I didn't.

Wrecks: I've never heard of (let alone heard) that song, but I, too, suffer from rack on the brain. WHOSE rack, I'll never admit.

Catgirl: I've never seen them in the same place at the same time. Hmmm.

Philbo & Claude 4 Prez: I'm only too happy to have you two finally put this page to worthwhile use. Please continue. When I lived in Rome, one of my roommates used our bidet as a goldfish bowl. Feel free to use that; you don't need to thank me. No, really. One more: "You potty Francais/You had a bidet."
Confission - June 10, 2006 - Report this comment
i love the happy ending. this one made me lmao (my butt came detached), but it's alright cuz i have a band-aid
Matthias - June 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Don't hurt yourself....
Phil Alexander - June 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Well, I suppose it's better to use a bidet as a goldfish bowl than the other way round...
HERE'S ROBERT LUND'S RECORDING - June 28, 2006 - Report this comment
www.spaff.com/poesy/bandaid.html

Belated thanks (and heh hehs) for your comments, Confission & Matthias & Phil!
Jack Wilson - June 28, 2006 - Report this comment
HOLY CRAP I LOVE IT! 555
Koibito No Yami (Gared) - July 10, 2006 - Report this comment
OMG Spaff...whatz ur problem? Why did you have to make yours so good? Now all the rest of us have to try to beat it LOL Nice job!
Spaff.com - July 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanx, Jackie & Gared! This is going to be on the Dr. Demento Show this weekend, so tune that baby in.
Daniel Powter - September 09, 2006 - Report this comment
This is a hillarus song Mr. spaff, I wish I would have written it! I think it's "Cute" so don't worry I won't sue!!
Ken - September 18, 2006 - Report this comment
My brother and I laughed for a while after reading that one we both love it. Thanks alot!!!
Spaff.com - September 23, 2006 - Report this comment
Daniel: I wish you would have written it too.

Ken: No, thank YOU. And your brother. Say hi to Barbie for me.
Jack Wilson - November 05, 2006 - Report this comment
Daniel Powter,are you THE Daniel Powter? Like the one behind "Bad Day"?
Daniel Powter - December 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Yes!!
Jack Wilson - December 12, 2006 - Report this comment
Wait Spaff you actually lived in THE Rome? Wow or Rome New York?
Spaff.com - December 12, 2006 - Report this comment
Rome, New York? Do they have bidets there?
Jack Wilson - December 13, 2006 - Report this comment
Not sure!
Rebecca - November 16, 2007 - Report this comment
I don't like it. I love it!!!
Spaff.com - December 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanx, Rebecca. It loves you too.

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