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Song Parodies -> "Poll Me"

Original Song Title:

"Hold Me"

Original Performer:

Clay Aiken

Parody Song Title:

"Poll Me"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

In searching, I couldn't find the name of original artist, although I remember the song. Whoever did it, he could actually sing, unlike talent-free shmuck Clay Aiken, who covered the song. So I've listed that dweeb as the artist, but if anyone knows who did the original, I'd like to know.
Poll Me

Poll me, poll me.
Get me on the phone and make my role be pollee.
Ask me when I vote what will my goal be: hold the
Line or vote for someone who's brand new?

Drill me (drill me), drill me (drill me)
In your rating system, where it's
Nil-three (nil-three), nil-three (nil-three)
Nil means "not at all," but 3 means "will be, will be
Supporting that bozo in the booth."

You imply one of them's a pencil-necked putz,
Just a fool, while the other is oh so fine.
I hear your drivel; say, "Do you think I'm nuts?
Your transparent partisanship
Is driving me out of my mind!"

Piss me (piss me), piss me (piss me)
Off with stupid questions, stooge, I'll
Miss the (miss the), miss the (miss the)
Movie of the Week; it is a myst'ry, myst'ry.
Now I'll never know who told the truth.

Piss me (piss me), piss me (piss me)
Off with stupid questions, stooge, I'll
Miss the (miss the), miss the (miss the)
Movie of the Week, and now I'm hissy, hissy.
You've forced me to say something uncouth.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.8
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   2

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Mari D - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah, John! Clay Aiken covered this? Ohhhh. The original artist was Mel Carter, 1965. The full title was "Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me."
EmiLoca - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS...or thought I did...Aiken did not actually cover this song, but sings a completely different tune with this title. Funny stuff though!
John Barry - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Mel Carter! Thanks, Mari. Emil, I found the original lyrics, with Aiken listed as the artist. Mercifully, I've never heard this putz sing it.

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