(I could watch grass grow 'till it's half past five)
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man

(Stare at what's for lunch, just in case it comes to life)
I'm just so bored-ass, man

Heeyyyyy
I'm home all by myself on a Friday night
And once again I've nothing going on tonight
I might throw cupcakes against the wall
BUt then again, I could go bowling at the mall
Yes, I've got no life, but I am at fault
I'm a wall starin', finger twiddlin' bored-ass man
A dart throwin', overeatin' bored-ass man

Ooh, yaaaayy
Might try to make a coffee cup from bamboo shoots and vines
Might chug champagne, then try to tell the time
Could try to find the diff'rence between chips and fries (Like chips and fries)
There's no one online that I could chat to all night

Pretend I'm in fog, pretend I'm a dog
I'm a wall-drawin', paper-foldin' bored-ass man
A web-surfin', beanbag-loungin' bored-ass man

(Scatting)

Hey, yeah
Yeeeeeaaay

Oh yeah, sit around!

I could scratch my balls, could run into walls
I'm a knife-throwin', baseball-jugglin' bored-ass man
A fork-combin', smoke pipe-blowin' bored-ass man

Whoa, yeah
Throwing pens around, one made a little dot
Right there on the wall, although it's hard to spot
I try to scrub that dot away (oh)
What a way to waste a day

(Look at my watch, and it is Saturday)
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
(Still got nothin' on, gotta waste another day)
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man

Watch 'I, Robot', throwin' pots, make myself a lollipop
(I am so bored-ass, man)
Listen to pop, flip and flop, make balloons go pop
(I'm just so bored-ass, man)
Drink a juice box, drop it like it's hot, maybe smoke pot
(Yes, maybe)

Learn all the names of hurricanes
Fill my pants with codfish bait
Found a big bee hive, throw things at it (ow!)
I'm a glass-eatin', bottle-throwin' bored-ass man
(So bored) A cake-eatin', table-smashin' bored-ass man
(Bored) A fire-startin', window-breakin' bored-ass man
A ball-bouncin', fridge-explodin' bored-ass man

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooyeeeeaaaaaaayoooh
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man

(I'll get all the food that I found in the fridge)
He'll get all the food that he found in the fridge
(Jam it in the blender and set the thing to Mix)
Shove it in the blender, and watch the seconds tick
(Now it is done, will it taste well?)
Now it is done, it tastes like hell!
(Threw the bowl away, and it smashed on the wall)
This is what he does, he knows no-one at all!