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Song Parodies -> "Rhesus Monkey"

Original Song Title:

"Pieces of Me"

Original Performer:

Ashlee Simpson

Parody Song Title:

"Rhesus Monkey"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

When in doubt, blame the monkey. They can't defend themselves (verbally, anyway), they're mischievous little bastards, it all fits. According to this guy, anyway...
Such a mess that I am making
So much glass is breaking
And it's so far from di-iscreet
At least the damage is, dude
Cause I don't want people to view
I can't use my excu-use, see
When somebody tries to ca-a-atch
Me breaking things with my head
Caught in the-e a-a-a-a-act

Oh, it's not what they will see
I know how to trick the whee-eels
Of justice, great it fee-eels
Oh, as they look upon the wreckage
But way before they can dwe-ell
On it, I blame this he-ell
On my rhesus, rhesus, rhesus monkey
Blame my rhesus, rhesus, rhesus monkey

Claim the monkey's messy
There's no second or third guesses
No real need to look clo-ose there
He's a monkey, his habit
Is to break shit, why I nabbed him
When I offer to re-epair
All the time they smile and lau-au-augh
That's what monkeys do, right, man?
Bill's cut i-in ha-a-a-a-alf

Oh, it's a little sneaky
To blame Garry when I fee-eel
Like making dents in stee-eel
Oh, monkeys aren't that strong? I manage
Cause they're still quite good with too-ools
And people are big foo-ools
Blame my rhesus, rhesus, rhesus monkey

Faking a pose
So it looks like I'm gonna say
Harsh words to my macaque
To divert any and all blame
Not like I do this ev'ry day
Yeah

Cause if I'm constantly blaming
My pet monkey for my raging
Soon he's gonna fling poo at me-e-e

Oh, I'm not a big dummy
If I overdo my spie-iel
It's gonna break my dea-eal
Oh, cause I promised Garry if he
Doesn't freak when strangers ye-ell
I'll share my carame-el
Oh, not good for him, I kno-ow
Oh, hence why it's rare I go-o
Blame my rhesus, rhesus, rhesus monkey
Blame my rhesus, rhesus, rhesus monke-ey

If you're wondering why the monkey is named Garry, that's a reference to Garry Chalk, voice actor for Optimus Primal, the Maximal gorilla from Beast Wars, which celebrated its 20th anniversary 3 days ago. Woo!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

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