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Misheard Song Lyrics -> Stories -> Pearl Jam

Misheard lyrics (also called mondegreens) occur when people misunderstand the lyrics in a song. These are NOT intentional rephrasing of lyrics, which is called parody. For more information about the misheard lyrics available on this site, please read our FAQ.

This page contains a list of the songs that have stories about their misheard lyrics submitted.

Song names are sorted by first letter, excluding A and The. This is sorted by song title only, not by song title and performer. So if two different performers preformed the same song, you'll see misheard lyrics for both on the same page (provided the song title was spelt the same both times, and misheard lyrics have been submitted for both!).


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Pearl Jam's, "Better Man"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Can't find the butterman.
The Real Lyrics:
Can't find a better man.
The Story: It reminds me of a Land-o-Lakes commercial, because it sounds like the this dude is having a butter fit. For he can't find the butterman! - Submitted by: nikki
Pearl Jam's, "Better Man"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Can't find the buttermilk
The Real Lyrics:
Can't find a better man
The Story: Driving in my car in the country in Texas with a friend from the area, the 'Better Man' song by Pearl Jam came on. She was listening intently. Then she looked up at me, quite confused, and said, "Can't find the buttermilk?" So, those are the words we use to sing along to this day! - Submitted by: Cleo Peace
Pearl Jam's, "Better Man"
The Misheard Lyrics:
She lies and says she's a lesbian.
The Real Lyrics:
She lies and says she's in love with him.
The Story: I managed to convince my brother-in-law that those were the actual lyrics, even though he had the cd. And those are the words he still sings in the car really loud, off-key, with real fervor. No one bothers to correct him. The song has now taken on an entirely different meaning. - Submitted by: Izzy
Pearl Jam's, "Betterman"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Can't find the butter, man.
The Real Lyrics:
Can't find a better man.
The Story: I heard my sister sing this and I asked her, 'Dude, you seriously think that's what he's saying? Who the h*** would sing about butter?' She makes a noise like 'Ummmmm' and had to think for a really long time. She gets mad just remembering the situation. - Submitted by: of_the_girl
Pearl Jam's, "Black"
The Misheard Lyrics:
And the laundromat turned my wool to black
Tattooed all I see, all that I am, all I'll be... yeah...
The Real Lyrics:
All the love gone bad turned my world to black
Tattooed all I see, all that I am, all I'll be... yeah...
The Story: Eddie Vedder; what a hero, but bit of a husky voice...! - Submitted by: Paul
Pearl Jam's, "Black"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I know some day you'll have a beautiful wife, I know you'll be a star.
The Real Lyrics:
I know some day you'll have a beautiful life, I know you'll be a star.
The Story: I was very little when I first heard this song and so I thought he said 'wife' instead of 'life'. - Submitted by: Doommaster1994
Pearl Jam's, "Black"
The Misheard Lyrics:
So why do I sear?
The Real Lyrics:
So what do I say?
The Story: I heard the lyric correctly. My best friend at the time, however, was convinced it was 'So why do I sear?' As though Eddie Vedder were hosting a cooking show, and was debating proper food prep techniques. Anyway, we argued about it for over an hour one day. Almost every time I was around him, one of us would bring it up and continue to argue. Literally for years we argued about the lyrics. I'm sure that if I were to see him again, the argument would resume. Pathetic, really. - Submitted by: J.L. Culp
Pearl Jam's, "Black"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Tattooed on high seas
The Real Lyrics:
Tattooed all I see
The Story: This poignant journey turns into an absurd sea shanty, at least with the words I misheard. - Submitted by: Mike Hotter
Pearl Jam's, "Black"
The Misheard Lyrics:
sheets of empty canvas over sheets of red her legs spread out before me as her body lay still. And vicious thoughts spin round my head they're spinning oo they're spinning and all I wanted was everything and now bitter hands
The Real Lyrics:
Sheets of empty canvas Untouched sheets of clay Were laid spread out before me, As her body once did.
The Story: I thought Eddie vedder was singing about murdering his girlfriend. I thought he was crazy. - Submitted by: LALA
Pearl Jam's, "Corduroy"
The Misheard Lyrics:
The waiting trophy mat
You're finally here and I'm a mess
I'll take your engines back
The Real Lyrics:
The waiting drove me mad
You're finally here and I'm a mess
I take your entrance back
The Story: I wasn't really sure what a "waiting trophy mat" was when I first heard the song. - Submitted by: Caleb
Pearl Jam's, "Daughter"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Alone, this lass
The Real Lyrics:
Alone, listless
The Story: I assumed Pearl Jam were Scottish which is where I got the "lass" from. - Submitted by: Fi
Pearl Jam's, "Daughter"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Alone, weet-bix
Breakfast table in an otherwise empty room.
The Real Lyrics:
Alone, listless
Breakfast table in an otherwise empty room.
The Story: The fact that the weet-bix is a top aussie cereal (but probably unheard of anywhere else) is a clanger. Also, we heard this sung by our friend Adam after about 12 scotches, which adds to the humour. Nice one Ads... - Submitted by: Adam Brand
Pearl Jam's, "Daughter"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Hello...listeners
The Real Lyrics:
Alone....listless
The Story: A friend of mine thought the song was written as a song to open gigs with. - Submitted by: Adrian
Pearl Jam's, "Daughter"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Scent of a rhododendron
The Real Lyrics:
Center of her own attention
The Story: A chick at a bar was screaming this song one night. Everyone almost lost it when she belted 'scent of a rhododendron' out wildly. - Submitted by: big Dick Daddy Of Cincinatti
Pearl Jam's, "Daughter"
The Misheard Lyrics:
She holds the hand that holds her down
She wonders, 'What the f***?'
Don't call me daughter
[It's] not fair to me.
The Real Lyrics:
She holds the hand that holds her down
She will rise above
Don't call me daughter
Not fit to.
The Story: I thought this song was about a man born in a woman's body and his struggles with making his father accept his identity. Top THAT. - Submitted by: lisa
Pearl Jam's, "Elderly Woman Behind The Counter In A Small Town."
The Misheard Lyrics:
Hearts and farts they fade
Fade away.
The Real Lyrics:
Hearts and thoughts they fade
Fade away.
The Story: Due to the difference between the Aussie accent and Ed's wonderful American drawl, hearts sometimes sounds like farts. :-) - Submitted by: Eileen
Pearl Jam's, "Even Flow"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Even though,
Moths are all like butterflies,
He don't know, so he chases them away
The Real Lyrics:
Even flow, thoughts arrive like butterflies,
He don't know, so he chases them away
The Story: Thought this was a song about a guy who didn't like moths. Boy was I wrong. - Submitted by: Chris
Pearl Jam's, "Evenflow"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Oh freezing rather see you sitting on a metal made of concrete
Feeling maybe he'll feel better than a tazer
The Real Lyrics:
Freezin' rests his head on a pillow made of concrete again
Oh, feelin' maybe he'll see a little betters any days
The Story: It's 2016. I sing around the house a lot, and I just found out about this when my new husband encouraged me to look up the lyrics. Oddly, nobody ever caught me on this before. I don't think anyone really knows the lyrics to Evenflow. - Submitted by: Suzanne
Pearl Jam's, "Given to Fly"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Made it the ocean, had a smoke and some tea.
The Real Lyrics:
Made it to the ocean, had a smoke in the tree.
The Story: Standing in Seattle waiting to go to the Pearl Jam concert, I told my friend, "I wish I had a smoke and some tea." She had no idea what I was talking about. So I told her, "You know, like the lyrics to 'Given To Fly'." That's when she started laughing at me. - Submitted by: Taylor
Pearl Jam's, "Glorified G."
The Misheard Lyrics:
Don't fly Virgin with a pellet gun.
or
Don't fly Virgin with a pelican.
The Real Lyrics:
Glorified version of a pellet gun.
The Story: I couldn't make this lyric out, so I had to make up my own above two phrases. Unfortunately, my made up lyric(s) started sounding correct! - Submitted by: Paul R. Host
Pearl Jam's, "Glorified G"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Walk five miles and pay the income
The Real Lyrics:
Glorified version of a pellet gun
The Story: I was a child and my parents started making fun of me for the nonsense I was singing. How did I know you didn't PAY income? I'd heard about that in Monopoly. Never even heard of a pellet gun. - Submitted by: Nik
Pearl Jam's, "Glorified G"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Your fine cousin is a pelican.
The Real Lyrics:
Glorified version of a pellet gun
The Story: Driving to and from college, my sister and I often sang loudly to pass the time. When I got "vs." (and we just couldn't decipher that line), we made up our own. Uh, whatever, Eddie! - Submitted by: Paula
Pearl Jam's, "Go"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Turned to her nurses
And pulled out a f***ing gun.
The Real Lyrics:
Turned to my nemesis
A fool, not a f***ing god.
The Story: You're probably wondering why on earth I used to think this? It was because I thought the song was about his girlfriend having a severe accident and being close to death in hospital; hence the "Please, don't go on me". So when I heard the aforementioned part, I thought he was going crazy on the nurses in the hospital, pulled out a gun on them and begged them to do something to save her from dying. When I eventually heard the song was actually about his truck breaking down, I realised how stupid I was. - Submitted by: Jon
Pearl Jam's, "Jeremy"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Jeremy Schborghan...yeaaaaah!
The Real Lyrics:
Jeremy spoke in class today.
The Story: I kept singing it like this. My brother was saying, "That can't be right." I said, "Yes, it is. It's about a kid name Jeremy Schborghan." He said to go look it up. When I did, I felt really dumb. - Submitted by: Trew
Pearl Jam's, "Jeremy"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Jeremy's broken last days.
The Real Lyrics:
Jeremy spoke in class today.
The Story: I was singing 'Jeremy' aloud one day because it is one of my favorite Jam songs. A friend of mine said, 'You're such a big fan, but you didn't even notice that he says nothing about a damn last day!' - Submitted by: lilwiccan
Pearl Jam's, "Jeremy"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Jeremy's smoking grass today
The Real Lyrics:
Jeremy spoke in class today
The Story: My friends and I sang this song in a Karaoke contest and we chose this song b/c it was popular then & most of us couldn't carry a tune, so we thought it would be easy. In the middle of the song I busted out with the line and we have it on tape. All of my friends kinda stopped and looked at me. We got the loudest applause though! - Submitted by: Dana Lynn
Pearl Jam's, "Jeremy"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Tear all these spoken words, as it is.
The Real Lyrics:
Jeremy spoke in class today.
The Story: I'm a nowegian, and my English was not too good at the time when this song was a hit. I sang along in the pub, and nobody noticed my version of the lyrics. Maybe we all sang the same? - Submitted by: eRrOgEniOuS
Pearl Jam's, "Jeremy"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Tell me, Spokane.
or
Jeremy Spokane
The Real Lyrics:
Jeremy spoke in...
The Story: My mother actually misheard this one. She was telling my friends and I that she thought it was great that Pearl Jam wrote a song about Spokane. - Submitted by: HEATHER ROGERS
Pearl Jam's, "Jeremy"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Terribly Spoken, Ass o' day
The Real Lyrics:
Jeremy spoke in class today.
The Story: I was singing the lyrics that I thought were correct, when a friend looked at me and told me I was an idiot and then proceeded to explain that this song was about Jeremy. I couldn't understand any of the other words in this song, and apparently I didn't even hear the chorus correctly. - Submitted by: Brian
Pearl Jam's, "Jeremy"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Terribly spoken glass bidet.
The Real Lyrics:
Jeremy spoke in class today.
The Story: The phrase "spoke in" can be misheard as "spoken". - Submitted by: Glenn O'Brien
Pearl Jam's, "Last Kiss"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I held her close, I kissed her all askance.
The Real Lyrics:
I held her close, I kissed her our last kiss.
The Story: I only just found out (in 2005) that I've been singing this song wrong for YEARS!! I said to my partner, 'I never understood why this song is called 'Last Kiss''. He looked at me and said, 'It talks about a last kiss in the chorus'. I started singing the chorus and he cracked up laughing at my error. Now that I hear it it sounds right. But I never doubted that he was kissing her 'all askance', which I thought meant 'all over'. Actually 'askance' means 'With disapproval, suspicion, or distrust'. Changes the meaning of the song somewhat, eh? - Submitted by: malarkey
Pearl Jam's, "Lowlight"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Buxom jealousy tell me wrong.
I will feel calm.
The Real Lyrics:
Books and jealousy tell me wrong.
I will feel calm.
The Story: When I first heard this lyric, I was thinking, 'Does Eddie Vedder secretly have a thing for large breasts?'. - Submitted by:
Pearl Jam's, "Nothing Man"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Muffin man
The Real Lyrics:
Nothin' man
The Story: Every time my daughter plays this, I have to remind myself that Eddie Vedder probably wouldn't wax poetic about any 'muffin man.' But that's what it sounds like no matter how many times I hear it. - Submitted by: Jango
Pearl Jam's, "Nothingman"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Nottingham
The Real Lyrics:
Nothingman
The Story: Someone taped the Vitalogy album onto a tape for me; and the handwriting was pretty scrawled, so I read it wrong. I used to sing my misheard lyrics and all my friends laughed at me. They still do to this day, ten years later! - Submitted by: Ath
Pearl Jam's, "Of The Girl"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Highway man says get away.
The Real Lyrics:
How he makes his getaway.
The Story: I was at a Pearl Jam show. I looked over at my girl, and she was singing these misheard lyrics! - Submitted by: redmosquito
Pearl Jam's, "Rats"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Lick the dirt off Elijah Wood's feet.
The Real Lyrics:
Lick the dirt off a larger one's feet.
The Story: A friend of mine thought this was a reference to "Lord of the Rings". You know, how Elijah Wood's character, Frodo, is a Hobbit. And Hobbits never wear shoes. You can assume they step in all kinds of things. - Submitted by: Wadded Beef
Pearl Jam's, "Red Mosquito"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I am just a horny ol' man.
or
I don't trust the horny ol' man.
The Real Lyrics:
Hoverin' just above your bed.
The Story: My friend and I spent a good hour listening to that one part over and over trying to figure out what the hell he was really saying. Because anything, at that point in the song, about horny old men didn't make sense at all. - Submitted by: David
Pearl Jam's, "Satan's Bed"
The Misheard Lyrics:
John Bobbitt
Please don't leave your n**s on my car.
The Real Lyrics:
Jump off a cliff
Don't need your help, so back off.
The Story: The first time I heard this song was from the Fox Theater in Atlanta radio broadcast in 1994. It was like 7 or 8 months before Vitalogy even came out, so it was the first time I've heard this song. For the longest time we thought he said, 'John Bobbitt please don't leave your n**s on my car.' Try thinking that when you hear the song again, because to this day it still makes me laugh. - Submitted by: The Akkus (from Synergy)
Pearl Jam's, "Spin The Black Circle"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Spin, spin!
Spin around in circles!
The Real Lyrics:
Spin, spin!
Spin the black circle.
The Story: My finding out the proper lyrics went a little like this: My sister: "It's 'spin the black circle". Me:[Pause] "Bulls***." I'm not yet convinced that Ed Vedder isn't just trying to mess with my mind. - Submitted by: lisa
Pearl Jam's, "State Of Love And Trust"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Will defend Mahayana
Make it pain-painfully aware.
The Real Lyrics:
Will be in my honour
Make it pain, painfully quick, uh huh.
The Story: Heard a rumor that Eddie Vedder practiced Mahayana Buddhism and was sure that it was true when I heard the "State of Love and Trust" track on the "Singles" soundtrack. Just goes to show you the power of suggestion. - Submitted by: Schlarg Heimer
Pearl Jam's, "Why Go?"
The Misheard Lyrics:
She scratches the litter.
The Real Lyrics:
She scratches a letter.
The Story: I wasn't exactly sure what the words were until one day my sister was thinking about it and said, 'Well, maybe it's about a cat using a litter box!' We knew it wasn't the real answer but it seemed as good as any, until we found the real lyrics. I still sing our version because it's more fun to picture big hard Pearl Jam moshing to a song about a wee kitten. - Submitted by: Kaz
Pearl Jam's, "Why Go?"
The Misheard Lyrics:
White girl ho!
The Real Lyrics:
Why go home?
The Story: The day before this was submitted, someone who I was around asked his friend, 'Why are you going home?' which made me sing this song. This is what he heard me sing. Since I am white he was really shocked to hear me say this. - Submitted by: wadded beef
Pearl Jam's, "Yellow Ledbetter"
The Misheard Lyrics:
On a ceiling on a poison meadow said, "and he said I wanna leave it again". Wanting our help on a piece of weather, said "on a said I wanna leave it again". On a wizard, on a wizard on it's way, yeah. And I called and I said and i know and I said that I'll go out again. And a raisen on an evil gum said I dont wanna wear a box or a bag.
The Real Lyrics:
Unsealed on a porch a letter sat, then you said "I wanna leave it again". Once I saw her on a beach of weathered sand & on the sand I wanna leave her again. On a weekend I wanna wish it all away & they called and said that I'll go & I said I'll call out again. And the readon I ought to leave her calm, I know, i said,, "I don't know wether im the boxer of the bag"
The Story: . - Submitted by: murasakiaiko

There are more Pearl Jam misheard lyrics available.

Indexes: [#] [A] [B] [C] [D] [E] [F] [G] [H] [I] [J] [K] [L] [M] [N] [O] [P] [Q] [R] [S] [T] [U] [V] [W] [Y] [Z]

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