Song Parodies -> Away From the Rangers
| Original Song Title: | "Away In a Manger" |
| Original Performer: | Traditional Christmas Carol |
| Parody Song Title: | "Away From the Rangers" |
| Parody Written by: | Michael Pacholek |
Two. Hundred. And Fifty. Two. Million. Smackers. Even Bush, when he ran the Texas Rangers (into the ground), didn't make a deal this stupid.
Away from the Rangers, with feet made of lead
the little lord A-Rod would lay his swelled head.
The stars in his eyes looked down on teammates.
The little lord A-Rod, he curses the fates.
The payroll is lower, the baby awakes
and little lord A-Rod, some crying he makes.
We'd trade thee, lord A-Rod, but price is too high.
You'll stay with the Rangers, we're mourning this buy.
the little lord A-Rod would lay his swelled head.
The stars in his eyes looked down on teammates.
The little lord A-Rod, he curses the fates.
The payroll is lower, the baby awakes
and little lord A-Rod, some crying he makes.
We'd trade thee, lord A-Rod, but price is too high.
You'll stay with the Rangers, we're mourning this buy.
And he's still only the third-best player at the shortstop position in the American League.
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Hoping that the A-Rod - for - Manny deal goes through eh? Or have you been idling lately? You haven't heard? Not only do the Sox get A-Rod, they get Foulke and Alomar! Oh yeah. Our payroll's shot. We're trying to sell the team to Bill Gates.
If Bill Gates buys the Red Sox, his personal worth in three years will be 19 dollars and 18 cents. You want Roberto Alomar? You can have him! I'd love for him to Buckner some grounders against the Yanks. While you're at it, why don't you bring back Slo-Mo Vaughn? You'll be paying one salary for two men! Don't believe me? Call the Mets for a second opinion on Robbie and Mo: Dial 1-718-RIPD-OFF. (That's just a joke: Please don't bother the person who really has that number.)
Let's see who has that number...
Wake up, everybody: A-Rod is now a member of the Yankees. And as for the Mets' number, I think it should be 1-718-YOU-SUCK, because, for the most part anyway, the Mets have sucked since 1962. (Now look what you just did, Mike! You made me quote a line from a parody I wrote not too long ago.)
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