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Song Parodies -> "Oh Lord, I Scored Spock!"

Original Song Title:

"Under The Boardwalk"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Drifters

Parody Song Title:

"Oh Lord, I Scored Spock!"

Parody Written by:

TJC

The Lyrics

Don't know the OS? Here's a good MIDI, but they don't allow calls from embedded links (you have to copy and paste it into your borwser's address bar): http://www.fortunecity.com/tinpan/bush/206/boardwlk.mid ~ Now I'm no Trekkie, but I remember well that episode in the original series where a sex-crazed Spock went bonkers and had to look up the deets: This from Wikipedia - Although Vulcans live strictly by the dictates of logic, their veneer of civilization is ripped away from them during 'Pon Farr*,' every seven years throughout their adult lives. Once triggered, Vulcans must have sexual contact with someone or face insanity and death. Sound like anyone you know? (Me... I'm on a 5 year cycle!) The beautiful Lt. Uhura (first name Upenda, Heh, heh!) croons about her encounter with the usually aloof Vulcan icon—
{ Lieutenant Uhura sings }

Well on the Enterprise, we've got a restless uptight crew-ew
Been on this five-year gig, seeking a-li-ens to Feder-screw-ew
When—in the air lock
Down by deck 'C' (yeah!)
There lurked a lus-ty Mr. Spock
Pants to his knees

(When in Pon Farr,* Spock's )
One hot Vul-can
(He 'phased' the door lock)
Then whipped out Wrath of Kahn
(Wham! "All aboard" shock)
Did that 'V' with both hands
(You're never bored Spock)
Got two hearts and three glands
OH LORD, I SCORED SPOCK
SCORED SPOCK!

But when back on the bridge, I got a funny look and sta-are
Then Mr. Sulu smirked and pointed to something in my ha-air
Ewwww! Glop décor, Spock!
Smells like ben-zene (yeah!)
Guess it ain't just a Vulcan's *blood*
That's day-glow green

(Im-passioned boor Spock)
Lean green Ma-chine
(Mind-melding score jock)
Like some smart Charlie Sheen
(Unknowns explored Spock)
You'll be Captain and soon
(That's your reward Spock)
For "serving" Ad-mr'l Poon
Man, you so SCORED SPOCK
SCORED SPOCK!

So now Kirk is pissed, 'cause you went and you took his shi-ip
And the more he looks, well; the more he finds those green 'dri-ips'
Appeals board, Spock
Upheld your claim (Oh no!)
They're all covered in green goo, too
Have you no shame?

(Oh that Pon Farr Spock's)
Great in a 'pinch'
(You've gone too far, Spock)
Kind 'a droll—for a Grinch
(I once adored Spock)
Rules at 3-D chess
(And now I'm floored Spock)
Half the crew is undressed
Can't be ig-NORED SCHLOCK
SPORED SPOCK!

~

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 5   9
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User Comments

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alvin rhodes - October 13, 2006 - Report this comment
comic AND cosmic
Ravyn Rant - October 13, 2006 - Report this comment
There's coffee all over my monitor. At least it isn't green... I can't decide which line I liked better - "...smart Charlie Sheen" or the one about serving "Admiral Poon". Lots of really good submissions today, but I think I might like this one best.
Captain Pacholek of the U.S.S. Parodize - October 13, 2006 - Report this comment
No one ever said comedy was logical. Now we know why Kirk asked Scotty, rather than Spock, for more power. Somebody once did a parody film called "Sex Trek: The Next Penetration." I've only seen a discreet still photo from it, but suffice it to say that when he's aroused, a Vulcan's pointed ears get bigger. (There's a Nomar Garciaparra and Mia Hamm joke in there somewhere.) Five days of shore leave on Argelius II. Or Risa, whichever you prefer. (Since you said you're no Trekkie, I recommend you ask someone who is.)
AFW - October 13, 2006 - Report this comment
Ears fives for a very clever Spock Spoof
Spock - October 13, 2006 - Report this comment
May you live long and prosper...
Stuart McArthur - October 13, 2006 - Report this comment
LMAO - "Ewwww! Glop décor, Spock!" was just one of your trademark contorted/inspired lines, TJC - 555
Red Ant - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
Good thing Spock wasn't a Borg; I can hear it now: "Resistance is penile. You will be inseminated." I am however beginning to wonder of your origins, TJC: too many superbly executed parodies recently from you. =)
TJC - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
Alvin - thanks! ~ Ravyn - thank you and your monitor should be ok... unless it was a quadralatte red-eye with extra foam... that stuff'll eat through anything! ~ Cap. Pacholek - Thanks, and thanks for the advice... you can be hard to get a Risa out of... ~ AFW - Thank you and a very clever homophonic/alliterative comment of yours! ~ Spock - Thanks, but I fear my Dilithium crystals are rather weak now... ~ Stewart - Gracias, but when I flashed on that old Pon Farr/Kohlinar episode and Something About Mary, well, the rest is twistory! ~ Red Ant - Appreciate it, guy and I wish I had thought of the Borg angle! As to my origins... alas, I have but one heart and one `part!'
Non-Trekkie Turtle - April 17, 2009 - Report this comment
Not a Trekkie (actually an anti-Trekkie, and just Klingon to AmIRight), but the title switch alone got me! ...from doo-wop to the 23rd century, wow... no bored walk here.

Didn't want to comment before posting your tribute, so as not to give anything away... the tribute speaks for itself. 555 (Isn't this "copy/paste" stuff neat? You can leave the same comment multiple times!)

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