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Song Parodies -> "Diamond Lane's A Mom's Best Friend"

Original Song Title:

"Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Marilyn Monroe

Parody Song Title:

"Diamond Lane's A Mom's Best Friend"

Parody Written by:

Rick Duncan

The Lyrics

Marilyn never got to be a mom. If she had she might have sung this.
The lanes were made to drive your car
They've become a parking lot
So I prefer to schlep some kids
Then I don't sit and rot

My Dodge Caravan may be quite monumental
So diamond lane's a mom's best friend
As fast as I can, my appointment is dental
I'll take someone's brat, he'll get me there in no time flat
It's a pain, the other lane
And the tempers flare and bumpers bend
Those tickets cost some bread
So cops see several heads
Diamond lane's a mom's best friend

Speed along....Heartily

Talking long, on my cell phone, tell those kids to shut up!

There may come a time when I have to take side streets
But diamond lane's a mom's best friend
Where I have to go there is usually some wide streets
Grab a kid to show, I'm on the go, get in the flow
If they cry or ask me why
I say they can bring along a friend
It's then off to shopping, without too much stopping
Diamond lane's a mom's best friend

To drive all alone is distinctly moronic
For diamond lane's a mom's best friend
When kids drive me nuts I just sip a gin and tonic
It's quick and sweet under my seat and helps the stress
One slight buzz won't tempt the fuzz
Just don't drive ninety-five 'round the bend
I'm on time every day
Get the hell out of my way
Diamond.....diamond
I don't mean the shoulder!
Yes, diamond lane's a mom's best friend

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   7
 7
 7
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Arwen - September 14, 2004 - Report this comment
5s, Rick. I no longer live in the city...so traffic isn't really an issue for me...but back in the day, I was the bitter, passenger-less, geo driver shaking my fist at the car pool lane.

alvin rhodes - September 15, 2004 - Report this comment
this is the cream of today's crop...5s

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