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Song Parodies -> "Cathedral"

Original Song Title:

"Cabaret"

Original Performer:

Liza Minelli

Parody Song Title:

"Cathedral"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

*1950s Catholic bishop who had a TV show, "Life Is Worth Living."
Cathedral

What good's bead-spinning alone in your room?
Hump in the pew; it's full.
Vice in the cathedral—go hump; come in the cathedral.
Put down the missal; it's time to commune.
Deploy your own missile.
Vice in the cathedral—go hump; come in the cathedral.
Guzzle the wine; it's rather bland.
Come blow a horn; start genuflection—
You can be your own brass section.

Got plenty of false prophets in the room;
One's called the "papal bull."
Vice in the cathedral—go hump; come in the cathedral.

I'd like to biblically know Sister Elsie,
Who rings the bell when she balls in the belfry.
The archbishop himself was her delfow'rer.
Now she gives the altar boys higher powers.
Underneath her habit, she wears no knickers—
Makes it handy for novices and vicars.
There goes an old priest dressed up like a queen.
He sports the nattiest stole since Fulton Sheen.*

I think of Elsie in carnal ways. . .
Like to turn her over while my member sways.

Put down the missal; it's time to commune.
Deploy your own missile.
Vice in the cathedral—go hump; come in the cathedral.

Some ass for me! Some ass for me!
Now I am up there, in the belfry,
Banging the bell, as well as Elsie.

Now I'm emitting some labial rheum;
After ten months, I was full.
Vice in the cathedral, go hump.
Get b*ned in the cathedral, no rump.
Make love in the cathedral.


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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.6
How Funny: 3.8
Overall Rating: 3.8

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   1
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

sloatead - July 18, 2004 - Report this comment
sick, and not in a good way
Fulton - July 19, 2004 - Report this comment
Maybe John should become a priest. There's a good healthy profession that will get his mind right.
Non Voter - July 20, 2004 - Report this comment
There are still many good priests and catholics, even if much of their leadership is twisted and corrupt... just as there are still many good Americans...

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