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Song Parodies -> "Browser's Laggy"

Original Song Title:

"Sour Candy"

Original Performer:

Lady Gaga & BLΛƆKPIИK

Parody Song Title:

"Browser's Laggy"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

I've been doing this parody gig for 15+ years and I haven't done one about slow internet yet? This must be corrected!
B-Browser's laggy
Ah! Ah (ah)! Ah!
B-Browser's laggy (ah!)

My browser's laggy
I seethe at the circle spinnin' at me, yeah
Browser's laggy, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Whole thing is right slow
Drives me crazy, what clogged my net's pipe flow?
Browser's laggy, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (ah!)

Ev'ry single site refuses to load up for me
The title on the tab's all that's visible on the screen (uh)
Yes, I'm not an idiot so I've only got the one open, open (shh)
Turned it off and on but that's not solvin' it all now
Both the window and the computer, net is still slowed down
I've got things to upload so this is a genuine problem, problem (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)

My phone still works just fine so I can search online
Why my web's all kinda messed up
Did some server get fried? Did some cables get tied? Get tied? Get tied?

Nothin' will load up, somethin' is messed up
Closed all but this pane, it's still a total pain
Come on, load for me, come on, load for me
Want a non-blank screen, gettin' rather peeved
I've tried some switching, ev'ry browser's laggy
Come on, load for me, come on, load for me
Come on, browser's laggy (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)

The outlets are all fine, modem has the right lights
But still the speed's like a dead slug
It's all been plugged in fine but still no page in sight, in sight, in sight

My browser's laggy
No tweets or reblogs are starin' at me, yeah
Browser's laggy, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
"Just go outside"? No
Do you hate me? I don't do that shite, so
Browser's laggy, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (ah!)

Wastin' time, wastin' time (ah!)
B-Browser's laggy (ah!) (browser's laggy)
Hate this shite, hate this shite (ah!), uh
B-Browser's laggy
Drains my life, drains my life
B-Browser's laggy (browser's laggy)
Makes me cry, makes me cry (ah!), uh
Browser's laggy (ah!)

Boy I really hope that I haven't just overlooked a parody or two because I missed some keywords. Either way, I must also say that originally this was gonna be one of my classic "take the original title literally" kinda deals, buuuuuut I just did a dessert-themed parody yesterday. Also we don't use the word "candy" here in Australia, we call things like that "lollies".

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 LittleLots
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   13
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