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Song Parodies -> "Big Cock's Randy, Mountin'"

Original Song Title:

"Big Rock Candy Mountain"

Original Performer:

Harry McClintock

Parody Song Title:

"Big Cock's Randy, Mountin'"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Each evening when the sun goes down,
Then the home-hearth fires start burnin'.
Then the sack--it's repose you're likin'
And it's in that you are turnin'.
In your head you saw logs and snore away
After sheep you've been countin'.
You're deep in sleep; first it's a peep,
Then the big cock's randy, mountin'!

When the big cock's randy, mountin'
To awake you, there's no light;
Nonetheless, that raucous rooster
Rousts you from sleep--it's still night!
You're no rock star; you need resting,
Want the sunshine 'fore you stray.
Now the birds and the bees
Are still gettin' their Z's,
But his wretched air stinks;
You've got "screw bird!" thinks
When the big cock's randy, mountin'.

Yeah, the big cock's grandly shoutin';
Soporific soma begs
For just several more hours of sleep;
Hens ain't even laid their eggs.
Now pharmacology is moot;
His alarm's started your day.
So you gotta go
Start to brew the joe
But watch out! Don't fall
Down stairs, ya schmoe,
'cause your big cock's danglin' down, 'n'

There's the big cock randy, mountin'
A ruckus that's nonstop.
You can little dream with all that squall;
You're thinkin': "Gotta pop
That cursed bird!". . .go and get your gat,
Else you're gonna lose your mind.
Got a .22
And a .32
You would really like to down him
With a big bazoo-
ka, that big cock. Damn his shoutin'!

Got your big Glock handy, mountin'
Sight atop the coop of tin.
You've got it cocked; the firing pin
Is ready to push in
The bullet that's in the barrel. . .
Give the trigger a flick.
Out bounds a lead-gray
Slug that blows away,
That bird you'd curse
Now no grudge to nurse
'cause that big cock's sanguine-spoutin'.

You watch him fall down, where he's mauled
By a big dog's rav'nous snoutin'.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

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 3   0
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 5   14
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User Comments

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alvin - December 30, 2008 - Report this comment
especially liked "'cause that big cock's sanguine-spoutin'. "
Jason - December 30, 2008 - Report this comment
Very funny John. I liked it. 555
AFW - December 30, 2008 - Report this comment
Great use of double entendre...
MrMacphisto - December 30, 2008 - Report this comment
LMAO! I was mistaken... THIS is the best of the day... I don't know how you got this past the censors... 5-5-5
< ! ! ! > - December 30, 2008 - Report this comment
Pirate Jack, it's time for some serious New Years resolutions for you, Sir Sweaty!
Jason - December 30, 2008 - Report this comment
Who is this < ! ! !> person? Not Dr Music I hope.
John Barry - December 30, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, Alvin, Jason, AFW, MrM, !!!.
Kristof Robertson - December 30, 2008 - Report this comment
How do you constantly manage to churn out this brilliant rhymes, JAB?...I remain in awe. 555
John Barry - December 31, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, Kristof. You are much too kind, but I'll take it!
TJC - January 05, 2009 - Report this comment
Absolutely Brilliant, John! And BTW, I pitty the fools who consider this mere 'double' entendre (in my best Mr. T growl); I'm *sure* there are hidden Olde English jabs at Bush's incompetence in here... if I only had the wits to decode 'em!

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