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Song Parodies -> "I've Got A Little List (of new features for the new version)"

Original Song Title:

"I've Got A Little List"

Original Performer:

Gilbert & Sullivan

Parody Song Title:

"I've Got A Little List (of new features for the new version)"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

As someday it may happen a new version will go out
I've got a little list, I've got a little list
Of some essential features that we cannot do without
They all have to exist, oh yes, they must exist

There's cut and paste and email and 3D shades of grey
And interfaced appointments with the MD's PDA
There's lots of little shortcuts that will help you when you work
And some annoying "features" that will drive you clean berserk
Like animated paper-clips intended to assist
None of them should be missed! They've all got to exist

He's got 'em on the list — he's got 'em on the list;
And none of them should be missed, none of 'em should be missed

A feature to save energy - the world is running short
Environmentalist — that must be on the list!
New dialogs with options of "Ignore, Retry, Abort"
Now that's a novel twist.. I've got 'em on the list

The hidden little "easter egg" that nobody can find
You've seen it once but searching's gonna drive you out your mind
The new data migration tool that outputs XML
With no defining spec, if it is right, no one can tell
So now it's lunchtime, should I get it working, or get pissed?
I don't think I'd be missed — I'm sure I'd not he missed!

He's gone out to get pissed, yes he's gone out to get pissed
And he really won't be missed, no he really won't be missed

It needs a brand new help file 'cause the current one's passé
(An archaeologist has put that on the list)
That has to auto-update to the website twice a day
That update can't be missed - that's why it's on the list

This feature list has one more extra "feature", by the way
That all of these new features are required yesterday
But with only one programmer there's one thing that is true:
The task of writing all these things is going to fall on you
But it really doesn't matter what they put upon the list,
For they never will exist - no, they never will exist

You may put 'em on the list — you may put 'em on the list;
But they never will exist - no, they never will exist

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   2
 5   12

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Perpetually Beta-Boy - March 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Perfect executed G&S ditty gone 'techno' ... loved it! (well, it's still buggy V.09 love I'm handin' out, but it's gettin' there!)
Andria - March 23, 2009 - Report this comment
I hate those animated paper clips and the rest of those useless features, but I love this parody. 5s and an Andria Award for "Best Patience-Busting Bill Gates Invention-Themed Parody".
Phil Alexander - March 23, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks :-) code "EHB".. so nearly perfect :-D
Emily Whatever - March 23, 2009 - Report this comment
I hate the new version too! Just because somethings' new doesn't mean that it's better. It's often worse. I love your parody though.
kevin - April 08, 2009 - Report this comment
"This feature list has one more extra "feature", by the way That all of these new features are required yesterday" classic line good job
Phil Alexander - April 09, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks Ms. Whatever & kevin :-)

kevin - that's what work is like... the majority of the above are actual requirements (past and present) for software I am or have been working on.
Silver Power - April 10, 2009 - Report this comment
[SOTM] Jeez, everyones doing songs that I'm not familiar with, however, that doesn't affect my scoring, as I gave you triple 5s, because not only was it funny, but you made technology sound interesting.
Arwen - April 10, 2009 - Report this comment
SOTM...hee hee. Nice work here, Phil...I'm a big believer in "if it's not broke, don't fix it," so you can leave all those new features on the list...and I won't mind.
Mark Scotti - April 13, 2009 - Report this comment
SOTM - Technologically wonderful, Phil!
Peter Andersson - April 19, 2009 - Report this comment
If it ain't broken, don't vote anything less than fives.
Matthias - April 20, 2009 - Report this comment
I ain't too computer savvy so this was lost a lot on me... I did like the inclusion of the Paperclip guy though, lol
Below Average Dave - April 28, 2009 - Report this comment
It was just cool that you parodied a different Gilbert and Sullivan song, as a webmaster, I couldn't help but smile at this one.
bobpiecheese - April 29, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I know next to nothing about computers, but I did get a laugh out of the Clippy gag. Soooo...basically what Matthias said =D
Max Power - April 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Jeff Reuben - April 30, 2009 - Report this comment
You described the reasons I switched over to Macs perfectly :) Great job!
Claude Prez - April 30, 2009 - Report this comment
Fortunately, I don't have to be much of a techie to see how good this is. Classic Phil: Smooth, clever, and funny as hell. Great stuff.

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