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Song Parodies -> "I am the Very Hobbit who has Habits not so Hobbit-y"

Original Song Title:

"I am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General"

Original Performer:

Gilbert & Sullivan

Parody Song Title:

"I am the Very Hobbit who has Habits not so Hobbit-y"

Parody Written by:

2nz

The Lyrics

I've seen some really quality work done with this song, and took a stab at it years ago, but very recently got inspired to do this. I hope everyone enjoys. Yay, HOBBIT is coming soon. Also, the more detail-prone will notice some references are taken from a point of view or story other than Bilbo's. I hope you'll bear with me on that for the sake of 'funny' :c].
[Bilbo]
I am the very hobbit who has habits not so hobbit-y
The habits that inhibit other hobbits aren’t stopping me
I know elf kings and dwarven, and they think I am adorable
I haven’t had much luck avoiding matters when Mordor-ical
I’m never fond of wearing shoes, I walk around on hairy heels
My very normal day involves consuming over seven meals
The way I host a party and the way I greet and cook impress…
(hmmmm…)
I’d be so very hobbit-y if not for all the Tookishness

[Middle Earth Chorus]
He’d be so very hobbit-y if not for all the Tookishness
He’d be so very hobbit-y if not for all the Tookishness
He’d be so very hobbit-y if not for all the Tookish-Tookishness

[Bilbo]
I speak in both an elvish-y and hobbit-y vernacular
I travel far and wide and then come home to be a bachelor
In short, though I am saddened with no lady-hobbits hopping me
I’m still the very hobbit who has habits not so hobbit-y

[Middle Earth Chorus]
In short, though he is saddened with no lady-hobbits hopping he
He’s still the very hobbit who has habits not so hobbit-y

[Bilbo]
I’ve seen the Lonely Mountain and I’ve hung around in Rivendell
I’ve dipped a toe in streams where, later, ring-wraiths weren’t swimming well
And recently I found I’ve been denied a hobbit credit card
I guess that is the price you pay for hiking nude in Isengard
I see some crazy spider so I go and put my Sting on it
I do just what Beyonce says and gladly put a ring on it
I know of all the death and the destruction deep in Moria
(hmmmm… Moria, Gloria, gory bra… oh, that’s good)
But that was no surprise to me, I’ve been to Dwarven Mardi-Gras

[Middle Earth Chorus]
But that was no surprise to him, he’s been to Dwarven Mardi-Gras
But that was no surprise to him, he’s been to Dwarven Mardi-Gras
But that was no surprise to him, he’s been to Dwarven Mardi-Mardi-Gras

[Bilbo]
Then I can write a biograph’ of me, my life and Hobbiton
And get a deal that helps me sell eleven-million copies on
But mainly I will prove in all the words of my biography
I’m still the very hobbit who has habits not so hobbit-y

[Middle Earth Chorus]
But mainly he will prove in all the words of his biography
He’s still the very hobbit who has habits not so hobbit-y

[Bilbo]
I know the wizard Gandalf and a story I would gladly tell
‘Cause I believe that conjuror has conjured on Galadriel
I think of lady Arwen when I’m busy hobbit gardening
In fact the more I think of it, I think it’s hobbit hardening
I won by cheating Gollum (slightly) when we both were riddling
The larger folk would call me small but I think I’m more middling
You think that getting drunk to deal with life is not so hobbit-like
(hmmmm… hmmmm… aha, I have it)
At least without a wife I won’t see things Lorena Bobbit-like

[Middle Earth Chorus]
At least without a wife he won’t see things Lorena Bobbit-like
At least without a wife he won’t see things Lorena Bobbit-like
At least without a wife he won’t see things Lorena Bobbit-Bobbit-like

]Bigmo[
I have a MERRY drink-y-drink and PIP about geography :c]
I am a pretty rabbit who inhabits dwarven robbery
Mo natter how much ribbergish I’m rumbling so sloppily
I am a silly bottle of a hobbit made of pottery

[Middle Earth Chorus – shrugging]
Mo natter how much ribbergish he’s rumbling so sloppily
He is a silly bottle of a hobbit made of pottery



[OUTTAKES – YAY]
I cannot swim amphibious, I won’t engage in frog-ery
I am the very hobbit who has habits not so hobbit-y
Copyright 2012+ Glen Stollberger

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
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 5   17
 17
 17
 

User Comments

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Lifeliver - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
Wow! Some inspired and very funny rhyming indeed, underpinned by your comprehensive knowledge of Tolkieniana (?)

'Adorable/mordor-ical, vernacular/bachelor, Hobbiton/copies on' are standouts, while 'nude in Isengard' and 'hardening' over Lady Arwen got me chuckling; also, nice working in of Lorena Bobbit - not so much for the rhyme as the contextualizing. I didn't get the Bigmo verse, though. I liked the outtake - pity you couldn't use it but I'm glad you threw us the crumb.

You've done yourself Proudfoot with this challenging parody. You bow to no-one. A trilogy of 5s.
Peregrin - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
I enjoyed the parody and the shout-out, 2nz, even if it was almost a given :)
Arwen - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
Well for heaven's sake...if the Hobbit film does nothing more than bring about more Tolkien themed fabulousness like this...then it will have done a good enough job for me. Many laughs...many smiles...wondrous talent. Thanks for sharing it...this made my whole Friday, 2nzy....in love!
Glen S - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks for the very kind words Lifeliver. You named some of my favorite rhymes, and validated me on including the 'BOBBIT' reference. The ]BIGMO[ stanza was 'supposed' to be an indication of a drunken Bilbo, hence the non-sensicaly rhymes, the word mistakes and the mistyped name :c). I'm definitely feeling very Proudfoot about this one. Peregrin, good to see you supporting LOTR stuff, I know it's out of your comfort zone. I figured if you and Merry showed up I'd have a shout-out as a reward :c). Thanks.
Michael Pacholek - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
One does not simply give this parody anything less than a five. It is folly.
AFW - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
Not into Hobbits, at all...but I agree with all the other comments...many clever rhymes, lines, and references...great use of the alphabet..especially noted the Lorena Bobbit, and Beyonce tags
Glen S - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
Arwen, wouldn't be a LOTR parody without you. Glad you enjoyed it, you Lothlorien Lady. Mike, thanks for the kind words. We don't want any folly on our hands. And AirFarce, good to see you, and I'm happy that even those who don't buy into LOTR and Hobbits can still enjoy this. YAY :C]
Callmelennie - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
Apparently this OS is one of the songs, like "Bye Bye, Miss American Pie" and "We didn't Start The Fire" that separates the pretenders from the masters. Even if you had butchered it, i would have been impressed -- and you certainly didn't do that. BTW, did you see my LOTR trio of tunes from ten days ago. You can't find it in my index as i misspeled my name on the submission
Glen S - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks for the very kind words Lennie. and NO I did NOT get to see your LOTR trio the first time around. I just corrected that, and it was awesome. I would suggest resubmitting each as it's own parody, which I will be sure to link to if/when I get organized about a LOTR tribute. It's been unofficial for quite a while, but when I get a chance, I'll make it official :c].
Meriadoc - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
This was all round excellent! Favorite couplet was Rivendell/swimming well. The drunken section was particularly funny. And appreciate the shout out.
Dave W. - October 19, 2012 - Report this comment
Bravo ! This vocab-u-rarely see
Peter Andersson - October 20, 2012 - Report this comment
You know what they say; bad habits die hard - and apparently, so does a parody writer's good hobbit habits too...
Matthias - October 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Can't wait to see the movie. It's been such a long time since I've read the book I think I should reinvest some time to spend reading them again. All I remember is that The Hobbit was my favorite of the entire Lord of the Rings series.
Ryan - October 21, 2012 - Report this comment
Reminds me very much of Irregular Webcomic's hobbit puns and Christmas song parodies. Incredibly well done.
Macaroni Man - October 24, 2012 - Report this comment
I wrote a parody about Hobbits too, and it was inspired by the fact that hobbit is similar to the word "habit". But this is really good to be able to take viewpoint of one hobbit in particular and stick to the storyline in a parody of one of the challenging Big 7.
Tommy Turtle - October 26, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks for the link. If you had seen some other comment threads, you'd know that TT DK anything about the whole LOTR universe, but the wordplay stands on its own even without knowing anything about the scenario.

Next step in the challenge: Varying the three lines of each chorus, and also not just echoing the last couplet of the stanza. Lots more opportunity for more of that clever wordplay. But as this appears to be your first stab at M-G, very good technique.
Adam Eccleshall - October 30, 2012 - Report this comment
Excellent. Loved the dunken Bilbo verse :)
Glen S - October 31, 2012 - Report this comment
ADAM! You should go to the messageboards, in the 'song parodies' section, and post on my LOTR thread. We're going to stock-pile all of the LOTR work we can, and you've got some GREAT STUFF, more than half of which I missed when it came out. I hadn't even realized you did MMG THREE TIMES for LOTR until recently, and I still haven't given you comments on all of them. Anyway, head to the threads, and let me know if it's OK for me to link to your work there. And thanks for the feedback on this, YAY!
Peter Andersson - November 09, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Already voted and commented so I'm adding my back catalouge LOTR stuff to your project instead.
Chris Bodily TM - November 12, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This song is hard to follow, but I had to read your parody. (See what I did there? ;)) I love Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit. Can't wait to see the movie, hopefully not in 48fps. So many fun, tongue-twisting lines and loved the innuendo at the end. This is quite a precious parody. 555
Peregrin - November 24, 2012 - Report this comment
Oct 2012 SOTM: As per previous comments. A lotta work went into this, a hard OS to parody, well done!
bobpiecheese - November 29, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I got most of the general LOTR references, but as I've only seen the films (the extended cuts - took a whole day to watch) I missed the stuff directly from the Hobbit book. Still, this was a fantastic parody, no doubt about it. One 5 to rule them all, One 5 to find them, One 5 to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.
Meriadoc - November 29, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) As above and also must mention a few move faves:

lady hobbits hopping me

conjured on Galadriel

Arwen/gardening/hobbit hardening

Overall an amazingly well-done parody!
Abbott Skelding - November 30, 2012 - Report this comment
Never heard the OS before, and all this hobbit talk went right over my head...I apologize, but this spoof was lost on me.
Blaydeman - December 01, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM ) I am very much a LOTR fan and am looking forward to seeing The Hobbit (haven't read the book yet though) As for this parody, it was crazy good. If the film is half as good as this parody it will be a box office smash! Excellent rhyme schemes and pacing. Fantastic!
Arwen - December 03, 2012 - Report this comment
SOTM...remember that one time when this was my favorite parody of the month? Oh yeah...it was right now. Love you, 2nzy. Love this. :)
Arwen - February 26, 2013 - Report this comment
SOTY...remember that one time when you had three comments from me on one parody? Oh yeah...it was this one. I've gotta control myself. This is still a favorite...all time...excellence!

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