Song Parodies -> I am the Very Master of all Errors Typographical
| Original Song Title: | "I am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General" |
| Original Performer: | Gilbert & Sullivan |
| Parody Song Title: | "I am the Very Master of all Errors Typographical" |
| Parody Written by: | Red Ant |
Parody 100, to slam the typos in ~95 of my other parodies. Have a laugh at my expense. :-)
Me:
I am the very master of all errors typographical
Wrong punctuation deplorable, terrible, and horrible
I somehow butcher English, my handwriting is illegible
(From ampersands and commas too, no order parenthetical)
Know very well I'm daunted, too, with matters alphabetical
Should understand the usage, it's practically impossible
Suffer carpal tunnel syndrome regretting poor posture too..
From many stupid acts concerning wrongful semicolon use
Chorus:
From many stupid acts concerning wrongful semicolon use
From many stupid acts concerning wrongful semicolon use
From many stupid acts concerning wrongful semicolon colon use
Me:
Not very good at anything it's borderline ridiculous
Don't know exactly why I feel the need for double negatives
Unsure, it boggles, incredible, wonderful, it's magical?
I am the very master of all errors typographical
Chorus:
Unsure, it boggles, incredible, laughable?, it's terrible!
He is the very master of all errors typographical
Me:
It's such terrific mystery, so awful and unorthodox
I need to get around this, and finally get my point across
I write in my archaic ways nothing really so fabulous
Laconic I'll show more dissimilarities miraculous !
When using participles there should be no ambiguity
Absolute constructions are acceptable grammatically
Well I can follow rules of which the dictionary's said before..
But disregard my learning my eternal good sense pitiful!
Chorus:
But disregards his learning his eternal good sense pitiful
But disregards his learning his eternal good sense pitiful
But disregards his learning his eternal good sense pretty pitiful
Me:
And I can write my signature in idiotic cuneiform
I think my typing's pretty uncharacteristic not the norm
Unsure?, it flatters!, but I've shown all evidence empirical
I am the very master of all errors typographical
Chorus:
Unsure?, it flatters?, but he's shown all evidence empirical
He is the very master of all errors typographical
Me:
A fact, well I know what is meant by lowercase and UPPERCASE
But when it comes to using prepositions I'm a basketcase
With much despair reporting that suprise I'm quite illiterate
And that I know I'll never be an honored Nobel Laureate
Well I tend to put a lot of things inside of parentheses
I haven't fiqured out how to correctly use apostrophes
A dork, when I got splattered in the grade school level spelling bees..
I'll say the English section overall score lowered SATs
Chorus:
He'll say the English section overall score lowered SATs
He'll say the English section overall score lowered SATs
He'll say the English section overall score lowered essay SATs
Me:
Poor's my literary knowledge, I've covered this so thoroughly
Has only been lampooned from the beginning of the parody
But still, some doubters, and so I now type it all in capital*
I AM THE VERY MASTER OF ALL ERRORS TYPOGRAPHICAL !
Chorus:
Instilled, no doubters, and so he now types it all in capital
HE IS THE VERY MASTER OF ALL ERRORS TYPOGRAPHICAL !
I am the very master of all errors typographical
Wrong punctuation deplorable, terrible, and horrible
I somehow butcher English, my handwriting is illegible
(From ampersands and commas too, no order parenthetical)
Know very well I'm daunted, too, with matters alphabetical
Should understand the usage, it's practically impossible
Suffer carpal tunnel syndrome regretting poor posture too..
From many stupid acts concerning wrongful semicolon use
Chorus:
From many stupid acts concerning wrongful semicolon use
From many stupid acts concerning wrongful semicolon use
From many stupid acts concerning wrongful semicolon colon use
Me:
Not very good at anything it's borderline ridiculous
Don't know exactly why I feel the need for double negatives
Unsure, it boggles, incredible, wonderful, it's magical?
I am the very master of all errors typographical
Chorus:
Unsure, it boggles, incredible, laughable?, it's terrible!
He is the very master of all errors typographical
Me:
It's such terrific mystery, so awful and unorthodox
I need to get around this, and finally get my point across
I write in my archaic ways nothing really so fabulous
Laconic I'll show more dissimilarities miraculous !
When using participles there should be no ambiguity
Absolute constructions are acceptable grammatically
Well I can follow rules of which the dictionary's said before..
But disregard my learning my eternal good sense pitiful!
Chorus:
But disregards his learning his eternal good sense pitiful
But disregards his learning his eternal good sense pitiful
But disregards his learning his eternal good sense pretty pitiful
Me:
And I can write my signature in idiotic cuneiform
I think my typing's pretty uncharacteristic not the norm
Unsure?, it flatters!, but I've shown all evidence empirical
I am the very master of all errors typographical
Chorus:
Unsure?, it flatters?, but he's shown all evidence empirical
He is the very master of all errors typographical
Me:
A fact, well I know what is meant by lowercase and UPPERCASE
But when it comes to using prepositions I'm a basketcase
With much despair reporting that suprise I'm quite illiterate
And that I know I'll never be an honored Nobel Laureate
Well I tend to put a lot of things inside of parentheses
I haven't fiqured out how to correctly use apostrophes
A dork, when I got splattered in the grade school level spelling bees..
I'll say the English section overall score lowered SATs
Chorus:
He'll say the English section overall score lowered SATs
He'll say the English section overall score lowered SATs
He'll say the English section overall score lowered essay SATs
Me:
Poor's my literary knowledge, I've covered this so thoroughly
Has only been lampooned from the beginning of the parody
But still, some doubters, and so I now type it all in capital*
I AM THE VERY MASTER OF ALL ERRORS TYPOGRAPHICAL !
Chorus:
Instilled, no doubters, and so he now types it all in capital
HE IS THE VERY MASTER OF ALL ERRORS TYPOGRAPHICAL !
Copyright 2005 Red Ant. SATs is pronounced as 3 syllables. No CTS yet but... *This wouldn't look too well singing it. Imagine a PoP play with this line. PS- Good thing that you people cannot see my handwriting, it's worse than my typing skills...
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User Comments Follow...
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Very well done, Red Ant. Here are 555 bottles of white out for your mistakes. And I can REALLY relate to this.
I love it!
Sterling job you've done on this one, Antman....555
Yu Dun Gud! 555
I didn't spot no type-o's here...Fantastical Jobical!...fiveical..
Good job on your 100th. Catches the REVERSED spirit of that Addams Family (the cartooned series) episode where Gomez is depressed because everything is way too easy for him and he has never failed in anything and feels that life is no challenge anymore and just plain boring. So he sets out to deliberatelly loose all his money by buying worthless stock and land etc only to see the companies sky rocket and oil/gold to found on his new swamp properties, later on finally realises he has badly failed in his attempts to reach loserdom, thus actually become one. (Did that make ANY sense at ALL?). :-)
A very prolix effort and not a 'postrophe out of place... :-)
Thanks Dee! John: Kristof~Rick+ AFW_@ Peter. About the story Peter, I think I got it. ;)
Darn, I type slowly. Thanks Meriadoc! There HAS to be a typo in here somewhere though, if not an incorrectly used word
This was punctuated with style. 5,5,5
Wanna compare handwriting "skills"? I cn't even read my own handwriting, which is why I try to type everthing. At least the mistakes are legible. Very funny 5's
Thanks MrMacphisto. Adagio, I may post a pic on inthe00s.com to show you how bad I suck. Thanks for the vote.
Great idea, and some really excellent stuff. There are some pacing issues where the syllable count matches but the accent stresses are a bit too far off, but I won't wreck the 555 you have going. 454
Wow.
you tackled it and you conquered it, Red Ant - you've earned yourself a breather - great way to bring up the century - 555
Congradulations on reeching the cenchury mark. Not that I ever have to wirry about tipografical erors.
Thanks Lee, Offender, Stuart and Michael.
Grate jobb, eye wuz verry immpresed whith yure yuse ov wordz!
Thanks Rich Kapalin.
How'd I miss this back in June? It's INKREDIBBAL !!!! Great job, Red Ant, 5's all the way.
Thanks Johnny D.
[SOTM] Jeenyus is the only word for it 555
Thanks Dumb Ass Kid.
[SOTM] Very clever, some great rhymes.
Thanks Leo Jay.
SOTM--I always have a great deal of respect for the kids who can throw down a parody to this OS...and this one was very funny! Nice work!
Good stuff, I like the creative rhyming - impressive
(SOTM) Clever stuff. 555
Thanks Arwen, Mike Armstrong and Charlie Decker.
SOTM...See above...still excellent, Red nat :-))
(SOTM--very good, a twister of the tongue, indeed.
cant find the words to describe this song. maybe cause im tired. maybe cause its just that good. very well done.
(SOTM) Excellent job, with an exclamation point! A great effort here, one of your best.
SDOTM I mean, SOTM
Thanks Dee Range (agen): Agrimorfee: Dr. Bob: Jeff Reuben:; & Zerla.
(SOTM) This is still one of your best, RA
(SOTM) Commented above but, didn't say anything. Masterfully written! Bravo Red Ant and congrats on 100....555
(sotm) that's a hoot, Red Ant - the self-deprecation works a treat, and some GREAT lines - 555
Congrats on reaching 100 in style, Red. My fave bits are "unorthodox/my point across," "uppercase/basket case," and the line "And I can write my signature in idiotic cuneiform." I'd like to hear Alice in Chains do this one.
(SOTM) See above!
(SOTM) I can't believe I didn't comment already. I thinc thiss won is aughsum!!! 5's
(SOTM) Not a siongle typographocal error in this pone i see. If it wasn't so long i might adoopt this as my semi-official thjeme song. 555
I thought I'd commented on this one already: I can remember reading it when it came out. Super stuff, and remarkably quick to the 100.
I'll start with the few things that I didn't like to get 'em out of the way. it's not that your pacing was off, but the way accents work in parts of your parody made me lose the rhythm of the song on several occasions.
Actually that's pretty much all I can complain about. Well-handled subject, excellent rhyme scheme and really funny too.
Actually that's pretty much all I can complain about. Well-handled subject, excellent rhyme scheme and really funny too.
SOTM.. Red Ant.. bravo! You managed to rhyme so well, and it's bloody hilarious. 555
I second 2nz on the imabic stressing of the song, but nonetheless a very enjoyable read with nice rhyming, as usual.
IDKTOS but think its a grate concpet.
Out of curiosity, how long did it take to type this? 5's.
Thanks Kristof, Rick C, Stuart, Spaff, Johnny D, Phil Alexander, 2nz, Mikey Squirrel, Luke Brattoni, Mr X, and Dominic L.
To answer a few comments here:
Kristof: It was your comment and an unintentional typo I made on "English is illogical !" that got this parody idea started. Thanks for mentioning "punctuation".=)
Stuart: I had to struggle beyond belief to come up with something other than "I Suck" ad nauseum to shamelessly rip myself here.
Spaff: If this were 1990 and Layne were still alive and in his prime no doubt he could sing it, probably in 5 breaths.
Ethan: A bit of irony on that point which I was hoping would get noticed, but I believe I slaughted the usage of commas here. At least the apostrophes escaped unharmed
2nz and Luke: Thanks for pointing out the stressing issues. Next time I tackle this OS I'll try to get that right. =)
Dominic L: Well, I can't remember right now but way too long.
Thanks for all the rhymes mentions as well, it literally took me hours to find something close to "Heliogabulous" (really so fabulous),"(of)Caracticus's" (uncharacteristic)and "peculiarities" that fit the scheme of the parody.
To answer a few comments here:
Kristof: It was your comment and an unintentional typo I made on "English is illogical !" that got this parody idea started. Thanks for mentioning "punctuation".=)
Stuart: I had to struggle beyond belief to come up with something other than "I Suck" ad nauseum to shamelessly rip myself here.
Spaff: If this were 1990 and Layne were still alive and in his prime no doubt he could sing it, probably in 5 breaths.
Ethan: A bit of irony on that point which I was hoping would get noticed, but I believe I slaughted the usage of commas here. At least the apostrophes escaped unharmed
2nz and Luke: Thanks for pointing out the stressing issues. Next time I tackle this OS I'll try to get that right. =)
Dominic L: Well, I can't remember right now but way too long.
Thanks for all the rhymes mentions as well, it literally took me hours to find something close to "Heliogabulous" (really so fabulous),"(of)Caracticus's" (uncharacteristic)and "peculiarities" that fit the scheme of the parody.
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=3009.0;id=7405;image
Thanks Johnny D for the medal posting. Thanks as well Tim Mayfield, missed you earlier.
I am a Gilbert and Sullivan fan and the wife of an English professor, so when I saw your title and the song being parodied, I had to look. I was not disappointed! You took an extremely difficult (almost impossible) original and came up with a very decent parody. I write songs and song parodies, so I can appreciate the amount of work that went into this one. My husband is going to have a good laugh over this. He teaches Adult Basic Ed and English 101 in a community college, and despairs over his students' lack of concern about spelling and grammar. In this computer era, yo, 2 ez 2 use lingo, n why need write gd, eh? rotflmao GTG, TTFN, (((hug)))
Thanks Jacqui. I recognize the IM speak, though I'm at a loss as to what TTFN means.
Red Ant, I can't believe nobody noticed the one typo that was (intentionally?) put in, that is, "I haven't fiQured out..." with the Q instead of the G. Sorry about that. I kind of have a reputation for being a good proofreader, and I can't stand it when I myself misuse spelling or grammar. Another worthy MG parody. =) Oh yeah, and TTFN is Ta Ta For Now.
Thanks Cat, and that typo was unintentional (as was "suprise"). I suppose I should look into using a spell-checker some day.
(SOTY05) see above
See above..................just kidding; my first time here. Excellent stuff, I can see why it did so well. Very clever.
I'm still very impressed, Jack, at the way you hit the century mark with such style.
Thanks Agrimorfee, Claude, and Spaff.
I'm sorry to say this, but you split an infinitive near the end: it should be "correctly to use apostrophes" (though that sounds strange), not "to correctly use apostrophes". Apart from that, though, I loved it.
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