Now I don't need to tell you, just how tough life can be.
For I'm a living example of a guy with no Feng Shui.
I tell you that - it gets so hard now baby, life gets so hard now baby,
Life gets so hard, I could cry!

My beemer needs a wax job; the paint is getting dull,
Not to mention all the birdie poop left there by those sea gulls,
I tell you that - it gets so boring baby, scrubbing and scouring baby,
Just to keep it looking good!

I've had to get hair implants, can't let that bald spot grow,
'Cause all the lovely women need more of me than my dough,
I tell you that - if you wanna be sexy baby, you want success baby,
You've got to be seen as beautiful!

My stock portfolio doubled, that means more cap'tal gain,
I don't how I'll pay my taxes, enduring all that pain,
I tell you that - You must be in the market, can't take your cash and park it
You must diversify or decay!

My plastic surgeon called me; he said I'd have to wait,
For there's a shortage of silicone on the parts I wanna inflate,
I tell you that - You must be lookin' buff now, staying an icon is tough now,
I've got to find the real me!

So now you know my story, my life is one of woe,
The hardships just keep mounting up; I've lost my golden glow,
I tell you that - being on top is tough now; it's never enough now,
'Cause everyone looks up to me!