Good one. Now, how about lyrics for the "Enigma Variations". . ."Enema Variations"?

Hehehehe, reminds me of that Saturday Night Live sketch where they advertise the album which adds lyrics to several classical pieces. Like Vivaldi's Spring: "Hey, man, I think you're awesome / You're really, really awesome / You're awesome / We should hang out."

Great graduataion day flashbacks. I mean, flushbacks.

That should be printed out and posted on every restroom wall.

He who writes upon these walls
Rolls his shit in little balls
He who reads these words of wit Eats those little balls of shit

Hello from Sebastopol, California, USA Enjoyed the parody by Mason R. I've written one (follows an anonymous one) below. I was surfing the web for toilet etiquette articles and I saw your site and thought you might enjoy what I've written here. Many places do not have unisex toilets but you all probably have the same problems at home as everyone else with toilet seats being left up by the men. For as long as I can remember I have always put the seat of the toilet down and not only that but lowered the lid too. It didn't occur to me until late in life that others of the male persuasion would almost uniformly leave the seat up after using the facilities..... just in case they were going to return, soon, I guess. Women I've known have taken great exception to the seat being in an up position. particularly late at night which prompted this limerick given to me early in 2003 (written by a man) I suppose. Her feet flew into the air Her face turned crimson red She felt both cold and wet And wished that she were dead Now the moral of the story is: Never sit down abrupt- Always look behind you For the seat may still be up Anon My answer to this is this: Seat up - seat down An argument to cause a frown Lid down brings fortune good Fair for all its understood JWM 2003 I've since added to this by pointing to good feng shui and the increased good fortune,pleasantness and good humor that abounds by this simple courtesy. I now make small tent style paper signs for the bathroom to convince people to lower the lid on the toilet for (good feng shui) which appeals more often than not to the feminine gender ......(with the lid down so is the seat), but men also like some of the limericks I offer. I also make some for the institutional lidless variety......a little more pointed in phrase; these adhere to the wall with double-stick poster tape. If you are interested and want a few samples........GoTo: htttp://www.sonic.net/~ronnie/lids.html Jim PS: Let me know if you want your selected samples e-mailed or ....... snail-mailed