I’m starting to sweat
(Baby, it's warm outside)
My armpits are wet
(Globally warm outside)
This decade has been
(Moisture’s upon your chin)
So freaking hot
(It’s all those cows, they fart a lot)

The fossil fuels we keep burning
(Millions of turbines churning)
Petroleum, gas and the coal
(Must admit it’s taking a toll)
Humanity had best start learning
(It’s possible things are turning)
How can we ever get to our goal?
(Maybe move up to the North Pole?)

It’s getting so late
(Baby, it's toasty out)
For COP28
(Definitely roasting out)
The average is near
(Hotter with every year)
To 1 point 5
(How will the birds and bees survive?)
We gotta get back to biking
(Walking, carpooling, hiking)
Commuting by train or bus ride
(Climate crisis can’t be denied)
A hundred and five
(Warmer than normal)
(Both) Baby, it's warm outside

“Ugh, you're quite the know-it-all, you know?”
“I'd like to think of it as scientific.”

It’s gotten much worse
(Baby, it's warm, yes, ma’am)
It’s time to reverse
(Warmer than warm, hot damn)
The troubling trend
(Here comes the drought again)
That leads to doom
(More floods and wildfires coming soon)
The modeling sure looks vicious
(Ignorance is pernicious)
In Celsius or Fahrenheit
(Get together, time to unite)
And not that I’m superstitious
(Think of all the penguins and fishes)
But countries are leaning far right
(It’s a generational fight)

We live by the bay
(Sea level’s rising now)
And that’s not okay
(It isn’t surprising now)
The hurricane watch
(Barometer’s up a notch)
Is on my phone
(Three feet of sandbags round our home)
There's bound to be big tornadoes
(As if we lived in Barbados)
There won’t be anyplace left to hide
(Can’t exactly outrun the tide)
I guess we could pray
(It’s starting to storm out)
(Both) Baby, it's warm
Freakishly warm
Outside

“Okay, fine, just pour me another ice cold margarita”
“That took a lot of convincing”