“Vaseline”

Chorus:
Oh, Vaseline
TheyI’ll always be true
Oh, Vaseline
They’ll only use you
From the start you could do ev’rything K-Y can do.

For good lubricatin’ the gals must still
Choose Vaseline, guess they always will.
When I go to visit Janey, June, or Jill
I always find a jarful on the windowsill
Where it’s pretty handy, hardly have to strive
To reach it when we need it, ain’t no need to strive.

Chorus

Janey used to keep hers on the nightstand ‘til
The night when she was ‘bout to let me drive my drill
It fell behind that furniture---if looks could kill,
I might’ve murdered Janey ‘cause she said “Hey, chill!”
I said “Huh?” And Janey anwered “Whoa --
‘Til I get that Vaseline, man, it’s no go!”

Chorus

June used to keep hers in the nightstand drawer
Lord , I’m glad it ain’t in there no more!
Digging out that Vaseline was such a chore
That it kind’a killed the mood when I was ‘bout to score.
Buiried ‘monst the junk in there and hard to find
My boner’d be a goner ‘fore the jar was mined

Chorus
Underneath the pillow is where Jill preferred
To keep hers 'till the dog got it, left it furred
Time came for usin’ it and Jill demurred,
“Use that now? Man, don’t be absurd!
But I know you’re disappointed. From now on I will
Keep my Vaseline safe on the windowsill.

Chorus