Song Parodies -> Father Christmas
| Original Song Title: | "Mister Sandman" |
| Original Performer: | Chordettes |
| Parody Song Title: | "Father Christmas" |
| Parody Written by: | Offender |
Yes, Lucy, there is a Father Christmas--in Narnia, anyway.
Father Christmas, bring me a sword;
I'll sign your waiver of my own accord.
Please send ahead so I'll have some armor;
Have Aslan keep Lucy where none can harm her.
Father Christmas, bring Lu a knife,
And healing cordial to save Edmund's life.
No need, though, for a magic ring;
And don't bring Edmund anything!
Father Christmas, bring me a shield;
Ask Aslan to help me win in the field.
Bring Sue a horn, a bow and a quiver,
And for acting like Scully, please forgive her.
Father Christmas, thanks for the sword;
Oh, and could Dad have a gun from your hoard?
My father's off at war, you see;
Could you spare a rifle or three?
Father Christmas, Lucy believed
In you before, and she's glad she wasn't deceived;
Give our warmest regards to her friend Tumnus--
And bring him seven books from C.S. Lewis.
Father Christmas, we're on our thrones.
We're eating crumpets, and we've got some scones,
So, Father Christmas, if you're free,
Come drop by our palace, pretty please?
You're invited; come by for tea!
I'll sign your waiver of my own accord.
Please send ahead so I'll have some armor;
Have Aslan keep Lucy where none can harm her.
Father Christmas, bring Lu a knife,
And healing cordial to save Edmund's life.
No need, though, for a magic ring;
And don't bring Edmund anything!
Father Christmas, bring me a shield;
Ask Aslan to help me win in the field.
Bring Sue a horn, a bow and a quiver,
And for acting like Scully, please forgive her.
Father Christmas, thanks for the sword;
Oh, and could Dad have a gun from your hoard?
My father's off at war, you see;
Could you spare a rifle or three?
Father Christmas, Lucy believed
In you before, and she's glad she wasn't deceived;
Give our warmest regards to her friend Tumnus--
And bring him seven books from C.S. Lewis.
Father Christmas, we're on our thrones.
We're eating crumpets, and we've got some scones,
So, Father Christmas, if you're free,
Come drop by our palace, pretty please?
You're invited; come by for tea!
I've got to say this for Father Christmas: you get some real gift-giving value from that guy. Not only were those gifts of weaponry very practical for the situation, but try opening up a weapons catalogue sometime and seeing for yourself how hard a good sword will hit your bank account these days.
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| 5 | 1 | 1 | 2 |
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I have a hunch there will be many more LWW parodies, but few will deserve to be lionized as much as this one.
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