Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Dear Old HGH (A Ballplayer's Story)"

Original Song Title:

"Dear Old Donegal"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Bing Crosby

Parody Song Title:

"Dear Old HGH (A Ballplayer's Story)"

Parody Written by:

Old Man Ribber

The Lyrics

Not so long ago, baseball's important letters and terms included "RBI" and "Earned Run Average." In far too many cases today, they have been replaced by "HGH (Human Growth Hormones)" and "Performance Enhancing Substances." This parody tells the story of a mythical baseball player from today's age.
It seems like only yesterday
My ball career went sour
A lifelong minor league prospect
Without a trace of power
Was six foot tall, weighed one forty-five
I looked so thin and sick
I sure enough could run and field
But couldn't swing the stick
Yet now I'm in the major leagues
And I'm just solid gold
I belted sixty-five home runs
At forty-one years old
I'm build like Arnold Schwarzenegger
Strong as defensive ends
And I'll tell you I owe it to
My laboratory friends

So shoot me full of the HGH
I'm hitting like a dream
And rub me down from toe to crown
With Barry Bonds's cream
I won't get into the Hall of Fame
But I've nothing to fear
Because right now I'm making
Sixty million bucks a year

I'm already feeling side effects
And not from crashing walls
'Though I'm no drunk my liver's shrunk
Like Caminiti's balls
But don't ask me to bury my head
Or hide my face in shame
I'm the only one I care about -
Who cares about the game!
So don't call me a role model
Just watch my clips and vids
And I am not responsible
For steroid use in kids
So don't presume to judge my case
Admire the way I hit
You fans and owners still cheer and pay
So who's the hypocrite!

Jose Canseco is still on the make-o
Roger The Rocket refuses to tell
Giambi's admitting and since then his hitting
Which once was fantastic has gone straight to hell
Raffy Palmeiro is not a straight arrow
Sosa, McGuire, and John Rocker's at risk
The Barry Bonds Ball will be sent to the Hall
As soon as it's marked with a big asterisk





Your comments are welcome. ;D

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - July 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Excellent chemical sports spoof
Fiddlegirl - July 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Thoroughly "injected" with humor! :)
blackjack21 - July 21, 2009 - Report this comment
This parody has the juice. You're batting .555
SamuraiMaster - September 07, 2009 - Report this comment
awesome parody man Liked verse two

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/bingcrosby134.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 1224