Song Parodies -> Aren't Seals Pretty? (from West Side Story)
| Original Song Title: | "I Feel Pretty" |
| Original Performer: | Bernstein/Sondheim |
| Parody Song Title: | "Aren't Seals Pretty? (from West Side Story)" |
| Parody Written by: | John A. Barry |
Rewrite of rejected "I Feel Titty"
Aren't Seals Pretty?
Aren't seals pretty?
Oh, so pretty.
Like a kitty, but out in the bight.
And I pity
Anyone who can't watch with delight.
It's alarming
That fish farming
Can be harming those so-charming seals
They're so pretty,
And it's all God's creatures' pain I feel.
Such a pretty world that He gave us; fair
To all animals should we be.
Such a pretty face,
Seals so pretty, blessed,
Such a pretty smile,
In a pretty sea.
Look! They're sunning
On sand, dancing,
They're stunning; entranced, I jump for joy.
All should love them—
Even boatmen who say, "Ahoy."
Aren't seals pretty?
Oh, so pretty.
And I hope fishers down in the Keys
Will take pity
On creatures with whom they share the sea.
It gets fizzy;
Churned and chummy—
Dizzy cetaceans stunned by sharp tines.
It's a pity
That Norway and Japan will not sign.
Aren't seals pretty?
Oh, so pretty.
Like a kitty, but out in the bight.
And I pity
Anyone who can't watch with delight.
It's alarming
That fish farming
Can be harming those so-charming seals
They're so pretty,
And it's all God's creatures' pain I feel.
Such a pretty world that He gave us; fair
To all animals should we be.
Such a pretty face,
Seals so pretty, blessed,
Such a pretty smile,
In a pretty sea.
Look! They're sunning
On sand, dancing,
They're stunning; entranced, I jump for joy.
All should love them—
Even boatmen who say, "Ahoy."
Aren't seals pretty?
Oh, so pretty.
And I hope fishers down in the Keys
Will take pity
On creatures with whom they share the sea.
It gets fizzy;
Churned and chummy—
Dizzy cetaceans stunned by sharp tines.
It's a pity
That Norway and Japan will not sign.
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
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| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 5 | 5 | 6 | 5 |
User Comments Follow...
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Awww. Seals and Sea Lions are some of my favorite animals. This is lovely.
hell, i think seals are BEAUTIFUL....nice job...5s
Earlier this year, my wife and I went on a seal-watch cruise in Rhode Island's Narragansett Bay. I gotta admit, them seals are cute little blubbery bastards!
You can't call a seal a bastard! Nevermind. You can. And I will giggle.
I don't think their seal mommies and seal daddies were ever officially married by a Justice Of The Herring or a Minister Of The Mackerel......so technically, they are indeed sweet, cute, lovable little Bastards-Of-The-Sea. ;-) Ork! Ork!
Loved this! Seals are just adorable. It's so tragic that we treat animals like scum sometimes and don't take the time to appreciate them.
Thanks, everyone.
This is weird, but even though your parody makes a serious statement, it made me laugh. I keep picturing some sailor singing this one with a sea lion chorus in the background...
JB - Great job. This one has my Seal of Approval. JD - That's a pretty Fishy explanation...Mari - me too, JB, you turned "smut" to "cute, but also poignant", as much as that may pain you. "Now taketh that 'Titty' ditty over to the 'Whatfreaks' site" sayeth the "Editor-in-Waiting" of that section. 5's...
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