She was a tiny gymnast out for an Olympic gold
Her age had to be sixteen plus, so we've been told
But she's from China, and I think
Their abacuses were broke, and they said she was that old
I can't believe my eyes, looks like the Chinese lied
She's an itty bitty Gymnast who, it seems, was thirteen

She weighed in at just 68, that was clue
This barely-teenaged wonderkind just eats Tofu
She only comes up to your knees
And she is so flexible that she can do what she please
But 'cause she's underaged, she's caused a stir, you see
She's an itty bitty Gymnast who, it seems, was thirteen

Don't root, the boot, give the little girl the boot
She's on the parallel bars, little Deng Linlin
She should not do a thing; she can't reach for the ring
At least, 'till London
But it does not matter much, so says the IOC
She's an itty bitty Gymnast who, it seems, was thirteen

She was some itty bitty Gymnast who, it seems, was thirteen
And when she did her fancy gymnastic doodles
She was flexible as she could be
But when asked what grade she's in, she said 8th. They said "Har!"
She's an itty bitty Gymnast who, it seems, was thirteen

A sumersault on the balance beam and a floor vault
That girl is agile by far
She sprints and she jumps but this is going too far
If she wins it.
'Cause she is only a kid. I think that it's obscene
She's an itty bitty Gymnast who, it seems, was thirteen

She's barred from the uneven bars because you see
Y'know she had an unfair edge, holistically
And so she walked off blowing steam
'cause the girl was told she could not do the balance beam
She's way too young for the Olympic scene
That itty bitty Gymnast who, it seems, was thirteen

Don't root, the boot, that little girl gets the boot
She's on the parallel bars, that poor Deng Linlin
No, She can't do a thing and she can't reach for the ring
At least, 'till London
And we're medal-obsessed, but it's child's play, you see
She's an itty bitty Gymnast who, it seems, was thirteen