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Song Parodies -> "I Could Have Lanced All Night"

Original Song Title:

"I Could Have Danced All Night"

Original Performer:

Alan Jay Lerner

Parody Song Title:

"I Could Have Lanced All Night"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Years ago, SNL had a running bit featuring Steve Martin as "Theodoric of York, Medieval Barber." The skits always involved bloodletting, a practice that was thought to keep the "humors" in balance. The humors thought to control health, personality, etc., were blood, phlegm, and black and yellow bile. My submissions today are humorous; with luck, they're also funny.
I Could Have Lanced All Night

I could have lanced all night!
I could have lanced all night!
My bowl had room for more.
I could have spread the veins.
Though I'd have spared the mains
And not cut to the core.
I severed so much that their skin was whitening.
That explains why their heads felt light.
The number of CCs will set my lancing fees.
I could have lanced, lanced, lanced all night!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 2.3
How Funny: 2.3
Overall Rating: 2.3

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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John Barry - July 08, 2004 - Report this comment
Forgot to mention: the original tune is from "My Fair Lady." SNL = Saturday Night Live.
EmiLoca - July 08, 2004 - Report this comment
Bloody brilliant, Mr. Barry. 5-5-5
Phil Alexander - July 08, 2004 - Report this comment
D'Oh... I was going to say "bloody marvellous", but EmiloCa beat me to it
John Barry - July 08, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks for the sanguinary comments, Emil, Phil!
Johnny D - July 08, 2004 - Report this comment
Bleedin' brilliant, dude! I remember that sketch well. My favorite part is towards the end, where Theodoric/Steve Martin starts wondering about what it would be like, someday, to have medicine based on science and not superstition, etc etc, and then he stops, pauses, and says, "Naaaaaa!".
Rod Worden - July 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Piercingly funny, Tim, 555ccs ! Johnny, thanks for remembering that scene!!

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