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Song Parodies -> "Blue Light Special"

Original Song Title:

"Red Light Special"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

TLC

Parody Song Title:

"Blue Light Special"

Parody Written by:

Joe the Crazy Conch

The Lyrics

This is another discount store-related parody, spoofing TLC's "Red Light Special" by focusing on that deplorable retailer otherwise known as Kmart.
Take a good look at it, look at it now
Might be the last time Kmart's here in this town
Everything is 60% off now, why don't you come down?
And there's going to be a land rush at the checkouts
Don't go too fast, don't go too slow
The employee back there said, "What's the rush for, Joe?"
No employee here's attentive, and it's all out of control
These bargains are all mine, all mine
I can only get them tonight
Kmart's giving out one last Blue Light Special
All through the night
These bargains are all mine, all mine
I can only get them tonight
I came through these doors
I walked in the store and I saw the blue light
I know I want something, I can see it in my eyes
I might as well be honest because everything's at a low price
I just found a blender for $6.99
I really hate Kmart, but those bargains are fine
If stuff moves too fast, I'll let them know
For this old Kmart, it's the end of the show
This sale brings excitement
And the checkout lines show
These bargains are all mine, all mine
I can only get them tonight
Kmart's hosting one last Blue Light Special
All through the night
These bargains are all mine, all mine
I can only get them tonight
I came through the automated doors
I walked into Kmart and saw the blue light
I want something, I sure know it
Kmart stinks, but I don't show it
If I need help, I could see
Everything's half price in Aisle 3
I need air filters for my van
And some other things, do you understand?
I'm a customer, a real customer
I know just what I want
And I know where I am
These bargains are all mine, all mine
I'm walking out of here tonight
I'm wrapping up the Blue Light Special
When I check out tonight
These bargains are all mine, all mine
Checkouts on my left and my right
Now one last time, I get to see the blue light
(PA System: Randolph Kmart will be closing for the final time in 10 minutes!)
(J.C.: Well, good luck and good riddance!)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   6
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User Comments

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Rob Arndt - March 16, 2015 - Report this comment
Just a note Joe that K-Mart's history on the BLS is incorrect. It was German John Koehl and NOT Earl B. that came up with the idea. Earl asked for instructions on building one of the contraptions JK made and later took credit for it.

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