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Song Parodies -> "Zero Chance?"

Original Song Title:

"Zero Chance"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Soundgarden

Parody Song Title:

"Zero Chance?"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

This song does not appear to have a MP3 nor MIDI readily available, which is a shame. Here are the original lyrics. An attempt more at poetry than parody, and I intentionally misrhymed (slightly) the few rhymed parts of the song as my initial idea for this song was "Zero Chance (of Ever Rhyming)".
[intro]

Yeah.....

Oooh...


I think I'll sing an anthem...
Mumble on and all my words....
I'll drown..

Band amp-li-fi-ers silenced
Cranked that bass down lowly....
Rumbled? Not a sound

I say if you've no heart....
You'll find a wasted soul......
Bored without your friends.......
Profound? Well I don't know..

Yeah...

Oh......
Ooh..


Oooh...

Intriguing love with likeness
Bizarre phenomenon, no laws...
Are found..

But as the moment's timeless
Zero chance? no, never......
Burning passion bounds...
Yeah

Dried dozen roses blood on me....
In emptiness..........

Give up and close this love and bleed?...
No pessimist........,
Ah, yes.....

I say if you look far...
In time you'll mend that hole......
Light will shine again.........
And that is what I know.....,
Oh................

Ooh...ooh...ooh....
copyright 2005+ Jack "Red Ant" Fletcher

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
 0
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 4   0
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 5   7
 7
 7
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin rhodes - January 03, 2006 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but i like the way this reads
Stephen aka Step-chan - January 03, 2006 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but 555, I agree with Alvin. Is this from their 3 album?(I've listened to their first two)
Joel Martinez - January 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Good parody and all,555, but I I know I might sound stupid when i ask: What does DKTOS stand for??
Adagio - January 03, 2006 - Report this comment
I read it as a poem and liked it.

Joel, DKTOS means Don't Know The Original Song.
Red Ant - January 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Alvin, Step-chan, Joel and Pat. Step-chan, this is from "Down On The Upside", which is an import album and doesn't have samples on Amazon. It's not their third, they had 2 (I think) before "Badmotorfinger" (their "breakthrough" album with Outshined, Jesus Christ Pose and Rusty Cage), so this is their 5th. As far as I can tell, this song was only on DOTU, which is probably out of print by now but you might be able to find a used copy. It's a very good CD.

Joel, as Adagio pointed out, DKTOS means Don't Know The Original Song.
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - January 03, 2006 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but from the overall layout of the parody compared to the given lyrics of the original I can almost tell that the band must have been on something inhalable when they wrote that original. Or maybe I'm just having prejudices.
Red Ant - January 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Peter, the drummer actually wrote these lyrics, which combined with Cornell's low-keyed voice, make a song that is more Pearl Jam in nature than Soundgarden. While it doesn't make all that much sense, it still is a very good song.
Guy - August 21, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4Z)

You wrote this over 2 1/2 years ago and you had no way to provide the OS for listening. Glad you found it for this comp. I first read it like a poem and liked it. Then I launched your Youtube link and I like it even more. Jack - You've been writing well I believe since you started writing parody on this site. Well done Sir Jack.
Matthias - August 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Nice rip on the original song, something that you're a master of. There wasn't any lines that really stood out to me on this one, but it was still clever, and pretty funny.
Agrimorfee - August 26, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) If you don't pay attention, you couldn't tell which one was the OS or the parody. :)
Below Average Dave - September 03, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) Yeah. . .that's what you are good at--ripping the OS. . .don't know what to add, this song didn't give you much to work with, not my type of parody target, thank goodness you are around to knock the songs that deserve it--this one wasn't so terrible to listen to, some of the others you've (deservedly) satired make "Fergalicious" seem tolerable to me. . .5s
Invisible Boy - September 03, 2008 - Report this comment
It does read well as a poem...and I liked it.
The image of "Dried dozen roses blood on me.... In emptiness.......... is quite visceral. Good job !

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