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Song Parodies -> "David's Got Plaque"

Original Song Title:

"Baby Got Back"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Sir Mix Alot

Parody Song Title:

"David's Got Plaque"

Parody Written by:

Below Average Dave

The Lyrics

I'm on badave.com as always
Oh, how, gross
Jenny, look at his teeth
They are so gross
They look like that dude named Austin Powers.
and, you know, that was only a movie
I only look at him because
his teeth are bright like highway signs, kay?
I mean, his gums, they're just so red.
Hard to believe their just so green
He needs
bleach there, That stuff's gross
Yuck!
It's filled with plaque

My teeth are bad and it's hard to hide
I need to wash them out with tide
That when someone walks by and gets a frown on their face
Then they're reaching for their mace
I get stung
It's really quite rough
They run from me and they pant and huff
Right at my mouth you're staring
I can't stand these teeth I'm wearing
They're nasty, all covered in yella
Looking like butta
The Listerine don't help me
and the dentist said he cannot help me
Ooh, got a brown tinge
When I chew it sounds like I cringe
I brush teeth, brush teeth
'Cause them rocks--they are glued to me
I've seen them blacknin'
What's with all this plaque man
Gums bled
red
Pouring out like I hit my head
Those clear white strips don't cling
so they do not do a thing
They don't fit real well cause my teeth aren't flat
Plus they taste like crap
So, stanky! (gross!) stanky! (gross!)
Are my teeth really all that bad? (Yeah Man!)
I'll try to brush it! (Brush it!) Brush it! (Brush it!)
Brush my nasty mug
David's got Plaque!

Normal face with a nasty tooth ache

David's Got Plaque

Normal face with a nasty tooth ache

Normal face with a nasty tooth ache

They hurt each time I bite
My molars are a fright
They're affecting my health
I really need a root canal
Pain I can't handle
Fill up the holes with chrome
And ouch, fill it-up, ouch, ouch
My teeth are getting so loose
I'd rather have dentures to tell the truth
I want them real white and shiny
The dentist said no way though
Insurance just said no
I'm telling ya that really blows
So brushing until I'm sleeping now
Flossing between them, washing them out
It has barely helped though
It keeps on growing like mold bro
These cavities have grown bigga
and plaque just gets thicka
The gums almost gone there
and I gotta save face when I'm using paste
Sticking that stuff on
Hoping all the color's gone
It's been yellow for oh so long
All the folks like to bicker and snicker
when I'm walking down their way
Oh C'mon, Don't poke fun
I'm gonna pay to have my teeth redone
So, Stop It! {No!} Stop It! {No!}
Could you please guys go and drop It {No!}
Wet my tongue, stick it out
I will never go and pout

David's Got Plaque

David's Got Plaque

Hey Doctor
Could you fix my teeth for me
I'm so sick of everyone's
jokes 'bout my teeth complexion
92 thousand bux, and no checks?
Ok, Do you have a pay plan Doc?

So that guy cleaned for 9 hours
In Between he took a shower
Them hours made my teeth cleaner and it gave me new power
No longer sour, poking fun
Cause I've got clean gums hun
So now I brush each night and clean up
To keep them white just like a pin up
Some friends are placing bets when it goes
Comparing how it look to mold
But what came next, you won't guess
Yes that crap came back in a second
So all them rocks came back
Although I brushed, how's that
'Cause I drink to much, and my sweet tooth's sickening
And the yellow was thicknin'
To the white teeth gals in the ads you see
Your stuff's fake you tease
Here is the kicker, It's even sicker
and that plaque came back even thicker
Guess I'll never have that white bliss
Cause my teeth sure are a miss
They were clean but I couldn't save 'em
So I just gave up, I just brush 'em
So people, if your mouths are foul
And you cannot get it out no how
Just give up and chew Big Red A lot
And screw what other thought

David's Got Plaque

Tooth-paste helped a little, but I've still go plaque

Tooth-paste helped a little, but I've still go plaque

Tooth-paste helped a little, but I've still go plaque
This has been a Below Average Dave production, All RIghts Reserved

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   14
 14
 14
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

San Hall - November 10, 2008 - Report this comment
This parody has really got teeth! 5s :-)
Matthias - November 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Well Below Averageg Dave this one really had me giggling all the way through... It told a great story and that's actually what I look for most in a good parody a great story and this one was. You should turn this one into a short video like Stuart did with his "100 Miles" parody.
No One In Particular - November 10, 2008 - Report this comment
I think this parody is great, but the parody author seems to have misspelled his name by accident. Is there any way to get it corrrected? I think it should be, so that it shows up on the index with all of his parodies.
UnKnownVotress - November 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Sir B+A+D, it's better than having the plague, sir !
Agrimorfee - November 10, 2008 - Report this comment
A few other misspellings, too, Dave. Consider resubmission? But of course this is up to your usual standards as it stands...intelligent people can figure this out. 555
Below Average Dave - November 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks everyone, I'll have Chucky correct my name, Agri--most the other spellings were intentionally, I spell check the parody but perhaps I need to start spell checking my name:)
Glen S - November 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Mostly good news here. Great job tackling this song, with a limiting subject no less. That may have been the reason you reused the rhymes for 'sick' and 'thick' several time. Honestly, I find it to be quality work, but I'm interested to see if it stays the same from now until when you record it (if you get the chance). My favorite lines included 'cleaned for 9 hours/took a shower' and 'ouch fill 'er up, ouch, ouch'.
Christie Marie M - November 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Great job, Dave! Funny you should write this, because I went to the dentist today and had root canals on all my molars! I had trouble eating and chewing and I'm going to have that problem for awhile. :( When I used to wear braces, after I had them removed, my teeth for some reason turned yellow for a while and took a long time for them to get back to normal. Anyways, you wrote a hilarious parody!
Guy - April 10, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC5D)

This parody deserves a plaque from the American Dental Association. Orthodonists everywhere can use this parody to brush up on their skills. Well done BAD.
Agrimorfee - April 13, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) Dr. Ag DDS declaires a clean bill of health on this classic.
Claude Prez - April 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Nice job Dave, some real clever stuff.
Matthias - April 20, 2009 - Report this comment
I still really like this one, but the only problem with it was a problem that I have in a lot of your parodies to be exact is that you have a few words repeating instead of rhyming, and a few of the rhymes were off. Like "Yella" and "Butta" doesn't rhyme, and you said "Help me" twice. That's only a few mess-ups in this on the whole I really liked it and I thought it was a very original and creative idea.
Jason - April 27, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC-D) I liked it. I echo Claude's comment.
Stuart McArthur - April 28, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) you are rivalling Matthias (and Ag) as king of the big effort Dave, but you are definitely king of free association because it reads like it all just tumbled out at once - btw, what does "When I chew it sounds like I cringe" mean?? or was that just to rhyme with tinge - lol - congrats for taking this OS on, one thing I will never do! - 555
bobpiecheese - April 30, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC4) That must've been a monster effort, Dave! And I agree, toothpaste doesn't do a whole lot to keep the teeth clean. 555 dentist bills for you!
Red Ant - May 01, 2009 - Report this comment
A few things you might slightly redo before a recording, but overall this was really good. I laughed at the "and that plaque came back even thicker". Smiles abound here. 5 shades better.
Melanie Lee - May 01, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) Not hard to sink my teeth into this one. A couple of times I could've laughed my dentures off! (No, I don't have dentures--yet.) You plotted it well, so when I nearly got lost I could easily find the floss--er, thread--again. David's got 5's!
Jeff Reuben - May 01, 2009 - Report this comment
It's good you can admit that, the tooth can be painful :)

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