Whooo, hoo hoo hoo

Winona Ryder was a well-known actrees
And she didn't really like to spend
One day she got a feeling for some stealing
So she walked into a store and then

She snuck some shoes to the fitting rooms
And she ripped off all the tags
Grabbed clothes she couldn't buy
And stuffed them in her bags
Whoa!

Come on!

Now Max worked at Sak's in Beverly Hills
As the store's main security chief
He saw a movie star walk past the guards
And yelled "Hey that girl's a thief"

He got wind of the stolen items
So Winona dropped her stuff and bailed
But the guards were quick and slapped her in some handcuffs
And they hauled her ass to jail
(Take her away, boys!)

Wahooo, hoo hoo hoo
Wahooo, hoo hoo hoo

Now Winona had to go to trial
But she didn't think it was fair
Said "I sure don't want to be found guilty"
But she knew she didn't have a prayer

Now the lawyers all stalled for seven days
But it came time to decide
She said "It wasn't me, I must have been framed
But the judge knew that she lied

Winona was in big big trouble
'Cause they knew she did the crime
But then her lawyer said she shouldn't worry
'Cause big stars never do time!