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Song Parodies -> "Svelte, Frail and Centerfold"

Original Song Title:

"Dead, Jail or Rock and Roll"

Original Performer:

Michael Monroe with Axl Rose

Parody Song Title:

"Svelte, Frail and Centerfold"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

To change the gender of the narrator is one of the oldest basic tricks in the parodist's handbook and nowadays I normally tend to stay away from those song ideas (been there, done that). With that said you've probably already figured out that this one is an exception, and you're right, the original song here is so full of male rock and roll clichés that I just had to flip it around 180 degrees to see how it turned out with new words from a wannabe supermodel's perspective.

A YouTube version of the original song can currently be found here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFYz0QP5xBQ
When I was a girl all I wanted to be
Was the thinnest broad on the slimmest cuisine
Now I eat on odd days, like a parakeet
I need be phat on the catwalk, see

I don't have a mind
I can't tell the time
The goals sufficed that all - else comes behind
Are

Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centerfold

I ain't trying out push-ups, they're trying out me
Three layers of make-up is my ABC
No sleep's on when I'm in a bed
I try to screw it off when men ask for head

Addicted to brine
Libra's my sign
But I have survived - my goals contrived
They're always

Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centrefold
Svelte, frail and centerfold

I have no behind
Ass I can't find
My goals sufficed that all - else comes behind
Are always

Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centerfold
Svelte, frail and centerfold
Etc

© Peter Andersson.

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