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Song Parodies -> "The Guinness Song"

Original Song Title:

"Thriller"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Michael Jackson

Parody Song Title:

"The Guinness Song"

Parody Written by:

marthadtox

The Lyrics

This is another song in the history of financial markets collection.. probably won't mean much to many people!
Back in the 80s
When Michael Milken's junk bonds ruled the roost
It got so crazy
A billion golden eggs popped from that goose
Was like a dream
Those high yield bonds just took off like a rocket
Oh Michael please
You know I'll pay them back
I guarantee
Just give some to me

I need that thriller winner ride
When I move on into into M and A
I can keep satisfied
I need that thriller winner ride
Insider trading all the way
Was such a billion dollar ride

But Ivan Boesky
Got caught and wound up working for the feds
They tapped his phones just as he and Saunders climbed right into bed
And that was why
Their manipulation could not be denied
They realised
The regulators couldn't let them slide
They put them inside
It was chiller killer ride
Well they had no place to go
No No they had no place to hide

It was a chiller killer ride
No they couldn't take the 5th
It was a grimmer chiller killer ride
They could not believe
That they'd wound up in jail for their escapade
It was all so unfair
Cos they hadn't done anything wrong
It seemed like the end of their life

But Saunders tricked them
You must admit he had a lot of front
That early onset
Alzheimer's scam was such a cunning stunt
He came out fighting
Determined to redeem his reputation
His human rights had been trashed
And he was goin to make them pay
He was goin all the way

It was a thriller winner ride
He took then on at Strasbourg
And he proved that he was right
It was a thriller winner ride
And he got some satisfaction from that
Thriller winner chiller grimmer killer ride

It was a thriller killer ride
Michael Milken nearly died in jail
But even he survived
It was a thriller killer ride
But was it really worth it
For that chiller killer

Now investigators have been Saundered
forced testimony must now be squandered
No matter how much cash you've laundered
From bank accounts that you have plundered

Those Strasbourg judges tore asunder
the weary law enforcer's thunder
they may come to regret their blunder
In times to come I shouldn't wonder

But thanks to Ernest and his chums
Maybe justice has been done
The right to silence has been won
So take the fifth and just stay stum

Big brother's power has been curbed
Shaken somewhat if not stirred
His complacency has been disturbed
You do not have to say one word

But big brother can fight back
With stings and bugs and honeytraps
It's very hard to beat the rap
When your computer files have all been hacked
That is a wrap

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Barry - April 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Ah, memories!
Phil Alexander - April 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Did Saunders get off in the end, then? I kind of lost track: wasn't his argument that in being forced to turn over documents, that was self-incriminating and ergo contravened his human rights? Seems to me to be a mighty fine argument coming from somebody who was out of prison 'cause his brain was Alzheimer'd beyond repair...
Rick Cormier - April 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Well done! 555
martha - April 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks for the comments! Phi Hi Saunders did get out early saying he had early onset Alzeihemers ..(subsequently due to his rapid recovery he claimed it was a misdiagnosis .claimed he had a bad reaction to largactyl...issued in jail to keep inmates sedated... symptoms mimic those of early onset Alzheimers.).. he did win at Strasbourg the use of compelled evidence has now been taken out of the system .. you can still compel it but you cant use it directly as evidence in the prosecution case.. the verb " to Saunder" has entered the law enforcers's lexicon....
Michael Pacholek - April 12, 2005 - Report this comment
A song with "Guinness" in the title? BRILLIANT!
Verity Clohessy - May 05, 2006 - Report this comment
Saunders never diagnosed himself with alzheimers. The doctors did and therefore he should not be blamed.

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