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Song Parodies -> "300 Pounds Fatter"

Original Song Title:

"Nothing Else Matters"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Metallica

Parody Song Title:

"300 Pounds Fatter"

Parody Written by:

Mikey Boy

The Lyrics

So fat no matter how thin
I'm still trying to count my chins
Got nasty tags around my skin
300 pounds fatter
I'm still eating 12 times a day
Taking shits the size of pound cakes
Boy I love hometown buffet
300 pounds fatter

Want some pie, and some cookies please
Walk five feet and I can not breathe
Got blubber wrapped around my knees
300 pounds fatter
Never cared for veggie soup
Broke the treadmill with my toe
My gut flows

Sweat pants don't even fit me
Heart attacks when I was 15
My body smells real shitty
300 pounds fatter
Always craved the chocolate mousse
Ate the brownies raw with dough
My gut flows
I always open a bag of lays
Eat too much and puke up souflee
Fat covers all my X Rays
300 pounds fatter

Want some pie, and some cookies please
Walk five feet and I can not breathe
Got blubber wrapped around my knees
300 pounds fatter
Horny for Thanksgiving Day
Always urged a 15th plate
Only swallow I don't chew
I don't care if they have bones
My gut flows, FAT!

Too big, to ride a small car
Brush teeth and find chunks of tar
Eat 20 peanut butter jars
300 pounds fatter

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   4
 0
 1
 
 5   12
 16
 15
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

The Pomfret (formerly Newfoghill) - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Mikey, you are a voice crying in the wilderness.
Scrawny Johnny - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
"Horny for Thanksgiving Day, " now that's hilarious!! I'd better be careful, b/c if I was to become 300 pounds fatter then my moniker will no longer be true.
Rick C - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Glad I stopped and read this. I know I'll gain from it.....555
Red Ant - April 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Great Metallica parody. PS- Try Subway as their parody sandwiches have only 555 calories.
Mikey Boy - April 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Oh yeah i'll remember that
Solid Snake kicks your a$$! - June 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Laugh Out Loud Mateiral you have here!
Phil Alexander - June 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Excellent, Mikey Boy - I've been pondering this song for, well, years I guess, but not come up with the right subject matter (always more of a problem when I really like the OS). Very well done, indeed.
aequitaS - February 04, 2006 - Report this comment
I love those food parodies xD Mind if i record this one?
Suzy Q. - July 26, 2006 - Report this comment
I like taking a serious song like this and turning it around to funny. I like your musical influences. Do you parody any local bands? Like Standard?

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