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Song Parodies -> "I Drink Everywhere"

Original Song Title:

"I've Been Everywhere"

Original Performer:

Johnny Cash

Parody Song Title:

"I Drink Everywhere"

Parody Written by:

Rex Ungericht

The Lyrics

If you want to try any of these drinks, you can find the recipes at Cheers!
I had entered a bar along the dusty Winnemucca road
When along came a rummy who was looking for a booze reload
"If you're drinkin' to get polluted Mack, join me to imbibe"
And so we climbed into the booth and then we settled down inside
He asked me if I'd seen a bar with so much stock on hand
And I said, "Listen, I've emptied every pub in this here land!"

I drink everywhere, man
I drink everywhere, man
Salem and St. Clair, man
In Maine and Delaware, man
Of liquor I've had my share, man
I drink everywhere

I've had a:
Tom Moore
Cowboy Killer

I drink everywhere, man
I drink everywhere, man
At the county fair, man
Got wasted in Times Square, man
I've really got quite a flair, man
I drink everywhere

I've had a:
Foggy Day
Maggie May
Hudson Bay
Gin Jock
Alley Shooter
Honey Bee
Carrot Cake
Bailey's Shake

I drink everywhere, man
I drink everywhere, man
In my private lair, man
I tied one on with Cher, man
Right here and over by there, man
I drink everywhere

I've had a:
Chapel Hill
Road Kill
Basic Bill
Oil Spill
Cherry Hill
Choco Buca
Gin Gold
Hot Gold
Black & Gold
Bear Fart
Heart Attack
Liquid Crack
Bleeding Heart
Hot Latina
Blue Christina
See what I mean-a

I drink everywhere, man
I drink everywhere, man
In the barber chair, man
On planes up in the air, man
You really should be aware, man
I drink everywhere

I've had a:
Early Burn
Rug Burn
Merry Widow
Weep No More
Juan More
Harvest Moon
Blue Lagoon
Sweet Afternoon
Chocolate City
Fruit Booty
After Party
Krunk Kitty
That's my ditty

I drink everywhere, man
I drink everywhere, man
Russia and Red Square, man
While on the thoroughfare, man
I did it all on a dare, man
I drink everywhere
I drink everywhere
I claim artistic license on one of the drink names. I shortened "St. Petersburg" to "Petersburg" to fit the pacing.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   16

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - February 03, 2009 - Report this comment
Brilliant work here Rex, I've actually had a Honey Bee before, good stuff. I'll have to wait until I'm 21 to try the rest of these.
TR - February 03, 2009 - Report this comment
That's exactly the way a parody should be written, to fit the syntax, rhyme and structure of the song and not just for the sake of putting words on paper. Note to all wannabe's: if you're gonna write a song, write a song; if you're gonna write a parody, follow the original to the letter. 555
alvin - February 03, 2009 - Report this comment
you said a snootful...great job
Tommy Turtle - February 03, 2009 - Report this comment
I didn't know that many drinks existed! Blood alcohol level = .555
MrMacphisto - February 03, 2009 - Report this comment
I'll drink to that... 5-5-5
Rex - February 04, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks Matthias, TR, alvin, TT, and MrMacphisto. The next round's on me.
MadameMucca - February 04, 2009 - Report this comment
Have ever been to Winnemucca, Nevada Lord Rand & Rexy, ? It is truly dusty sage- brushed place, indeed, Sir !
Andria - February 04, 2009 - Report this comment
Rex, if you like bars, then Springfield, Oregon is a good place to visit. Although the bars there are mostly sleazy places with heavily-intoxicated clientele, the quality of beer, wine, shots of hard liquor and cocktails is generally good. Great job, by the way, and I have read/sang many other parodies of this OS, ranging from terrible to excellent. 555 fifths of whiskey to you.
Rex - February 04, 2009 - Report this comment
MadameMucca - nope, I've never been to Winnemucca, but I've been to sage brushed places in Texas. Thanks! Andria - You've sung parodies of this OS? Would you like to sing one more and send a copy to the writer (hint, hint)? :-)
Andria - February 04, 2009 - Report this comment
Rex, I've read parodies of "I've Been Everywhere" on AmIRight and sang them out loud while sitting in front of my computer, but I have not written one. I am contemplating one about Jay Leno's car collection, but I would most likely get the parody's comment boxes spammed by Dr Music (who has escalated to the point of sending me harassing e-mails). Lastly, my singing voice has been compared with those of Neil Sedaca and The Singing Nun, both in a demeaning manner and had cleared out a karaoke bar once while singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", so you wouldn't want to hear me sing, recorded or otherwise. Thanks for asking, anyway. : - )
TR - February 05, 2009 - Report this comment
I think a song someone should parody sometime is Dave Dudley's "There Ain't No Easy Run", where he lists several trucking companies, some of which are now defunct. I have contemplated doing a "supermarket" version. What do you think?
Rex - February 05, 2009 - Report this comment
TR, I don't know if there are enough supermarket names to fit "No Easy Run". You want to find a topic that gives you a lot of choices for the list so you can always find something that's close to the meter and rhyme of the original. Food names, street names, and people names are three large categories that immediately come to mind. Good luck with the parody!
TR - February 06, 2009 - Report this comment
Actually, Rex, I have researched it, and there are hundreds of chains across the US and Canada. Could make it national, could localize it a little. Thanks for the support!
TR - February 08, 2009 - Report this comment
Oh, and by the way, this ain't Taz, TSB or any of those other youngsters you're talking to--I'm 44, I have been in radio over half my life and I am a writer and part-time entertainer on the side who cut his teeth on Allan Sherman, Ben Colder and the like. I don't know how to take your last comment.
TR - February 08, 2009 - Report this comment
AND, I have a parody about Barry Bonds titled "Bye Bye Barry" (to the tune of "Bye Bye Blackbird") on this site from four years ago, under my full name. Got one vote. So therefore, I have been reluctant to post anymore and instead resorted to being Simon Cowell.
Rex - February 08, 2009 - Report this comment
Pleased to meet you TR. Since I didn't know if you were 8 or 80, I just answered with what popped into my head -- which was that I can count all the supermarket chains in my area and still have fingers left over. :-) And I wish I was still 44. Sigh.
Matthias - June 15, 2010 - Report this comment
While I applaud your alcoholism to know this many brands of beer and be able to put them into parody format is a bit unnerving actually. How much time DO you spend at the bar?
Agrimorfee - June 16, 2010 - Report this comment
Here's a tune I haven't tackled...don't know if I ever will. Research always pays off, as it does here.
Below Average Dave - June 19, 2010 - Report this comment
I doubt I will ever tackle it because I don't really do list parodies, the sheer amount of alcohalic beverages required to make this song however is impressive, I don't want to know what a "Bear Fart" is nor do I want to taste it, sometimes I wonder if the people who come up with these names are on far more than the alcohol they are consuming. . .
LadyTiaMucca - June 21, 2010 - Report this comment
Sir, this one is in true tribute to "Dick & Liz" who drank more booze in more places than anyone ever ! ! PS: loved the ref to MInneWucca : ~TheGriddle~ is a delicious 50's diner there that serves the best Hotcakes & sqeeezed fresh OJ.
bobpiecheese - June 27, 2010 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Ah, but have you drunken all of those drinks in one evening? And in order? That'd be an interesting sight, particularly if you sung this parody whilst doing so. You'd probably get severely out of tune and/or key by the end, though, depending how big the glasses are. 555 for you, sir!
DJ Blaze - June 27, 2010 - Report this comment
Not much of a drinker, but still 555 for this hard OS and funny parody.
Skip - October 16, 2010 - Report this comment
You can hear a recording of this with these lyrics on

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