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Song Parodies -> "If You Broke the Bat"

Original Song Title:

"If You Had My Love"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Jennifer Lopez

Parody Song Title:

"If You Broke the Bat"

Parody Written by:

Ana

The Lyrics

About Jason Giambi breaking bats. (N.B. Any similarity to actual events is definitely unfair to the New York Yankees themselves.)
If you broke the bat when the pitcher threw the ball
Torre would feel hurt.
And if somehow you feel that Joe's leadership is cruel
He'd just fire you, not re-hire you.

Jason Giambi has broken one too many bats.
His Yankee friends in turn kept giving him new ones.
But if he keeps on going, they'll soon be out of bats
And none of them will be able to have any fun.

Just concentrate, and don't hesitate [in] aiming at the ball
Without feeling the urge to let yourself astray.
Control your bat and don't let it slide.
Go Giambi go! Just be careful with that thing!

If you broke the bat when the pitcher threw the ball
Torre would feel hurt.
And if somehow you feel that Joe's leadership is cruel
He'd just fire you, not re-hire you.

See he did it again! Giambi broke another bat!
Torre's sending Tino Martinez to the field
To warn Giambi that if he breaks the last bat we have,
He's gonna get suspended for a week.

The steroid hype notwithstanding, G, just control yourself.
Yeah, I know it's hard but you can't lose your focus.
If you're tense, the ball could hit you right in your face
Then you'd really be injured.

If you broke the bat when the pitcher threw the ball
Torre would feel hurt.
And if somehow you feel that Joe's leadership is cruel
He'd just fire you, not re-hire you.

Ooh, Giambi, don't break that bat, no.

If you broke the bat when the pitcher threw the ball
Torre would feel hurt.
And if somehow you feel that Joe's leadership is cruel
He'd just fire you, not re-hire you.

(Repeat and fade)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 4   1
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User Comments

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Ana - November 04, 2005 - Report this comment
My apologies to people reading this parody: This isn't one of the best parodies I have written because: 1. Jason Giambi doesn't break bats and 2. you don't get suspended for breaking bats. And to you, Giambi, if you're reading this parody at anytime and feel offended, I'm sorry. I got carried away with the subject and don't intend to do that again. Peace - Ana.
Michael Pacholek - November 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Mariano Rivera breaks a lot of bats with that "inside cutter" of his.
Becky Donoghue-Rick - June 27, 2007 - Report this comment
Michael Pacholek: I may be an O's fan, but I have a lot of respect for Mo as the best closer in baseball. That being said, why wasn't he in the game last night instead of Mel Rojas...I mean Scott Proctor???????

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