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Song Parodies -> "Heavy Stool"

Original Song Title:

"Heavy Fuel"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Dire Straits

Parody Song Title:

"Heavy Stool"

Parody Written by:

MrMacphisto

The Lyrics

Last year in October
Man, I felt bad
Constipation like I've never had
I had 6 hamburgers
And Miller Lite
Pinto beans to digest had me spraying shite

'Cause what I gotta run through
And I don't wanna drool
Well it might make a pool
I got to drop
Some heavy heavy stool
Heavy heavy stool
Heavy heavy stool

My life makes perfect scents
Musty, rude, and pestilence
Chex and raisins and granola mix
Eat them every night and then I'm dropping bricks

'Cause what you're gonna run through
And you don't wanna drool
Yes, if your rectum is cruel
You're gonna drop
Some heavy heavy stool
Heavy heavy stool
Heavy heavy stool

Match lit burns the smell that's strong
When I poo, it takes too long
I'd love some grapes, don't get me wrong
Hey, that's why I'm on the john

My legs will start to quiver
And ringing's in my head
Every time the doctor tries to make my cheeks spread
Well, he says that so far, I just need pills
I wrote a suicide note
When I fin'ly saw the bill

'Cause what you're gonna run through
And you don't wanna drool
Yes, if your rectum is cruel
You're gonna drop
Some heavy heavy stool
Heavy heavy stool
Heavy heavy stool

[7x]
Heavy heavy stool

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   8
 7
 7
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Andria - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
If you have heavy stool, I have two suggestions- take lots of laxatives (sparkling lemon-lime magnesium citrate in the green glass bottle is a favorite of mine), or go to Abu Ghraib dressed like a terrorist so that they will force you to have an enema. 555, but disgusting.
McKludge - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
6 hamburgers would do it, particularly if they are McDonalds. 555
alvin - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
its da bomb....disgustingly funny
Tommy Turd-le - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Great minds stink alike...
AFW - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
This was heavy, 555lbs.
59Eagle - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Oh no, don't tell me you've taken after Poomaster too. Sorry, but I don't much care for this one.
MrMacphisto - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Good one, Andria... :) Thanks, and thanks also to McKludge, Alvin, Tommy, and AFW. Eagle, don't worry... I only do the occasional poo parody. This was just too strong an urge to pass up. ;)
Red Ant - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
I remember this OS! Great pacing and rhyming, even if the topic is a bit bottom heavy. =)
Below Average Dave (badave.com) - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Red Ant. . .WOAH. . .bottom heavy. . .you. . anyway. . ."Yes, if your rectum is cruel You're gonna drop" was a great line. The topic at hand is an often debated topic, to my mind, as long as no one topic becomes an authors only topic (IE nothing but one type of parody) there is nothing wrong with a little dip into anything. Well, actually, Macphisto--I wouldn't dip into poo to be honest, I mean, that stinks, but writing about it now and then is ok. Good job!
MrMacphisto - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Red and BAD... :)

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