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Song Parodies -> "A Gumball Broke My Tooth"

Original Song Title:

"The Policy of Truth"

Original Performer:

Depeche Mode

Parody Song Title:

"A Gumball Broke My Tooth"

Parody Written by:

Arwen

The Lyrics

One night, went for a ride
With a guy who knows my friend, Sue
I was just mortified
Popped in something to chew

I might have believed that ice
Could turn into a dental vice
It would shock the greatest sleuth
That a gumball broke my tooth

My choppers used to really wow
They dazzled every passing guy
But I'm kicking myself now
Couldn't settle for Juicy Fruit--WHY?

Upper lip's got an indent
Some bubble fun was my intent
The confection seemed fool proof
But the gumball broke my tooth

Blood on my chin
And on the floor
Bicuspid gore
"Never Again!"
My blind date swore
And hit the door

How it happened, oh I've lied
Some folks think I fell in a well
My dentist pushed aside
My claims of an evil spell

From every candy I have shied
They look sweet, but pain lies inside
And now I'm warning you
A gumball broke my tooth

No telling when
A Heath or Skor
Will leave you sore
No telling when
The candy store
Will go for more

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 31

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   30
 30
 30
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jeff Reuben - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
I know some Depeche Mode, but not this one. The timing was perfect, of course =)
Arwen - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks a bunch, Jeff!!
Know 1 can hear you dream - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
My favorite Depeche Mode Song and I'm ill too (though in another way), how can I give this anything else than 5s? I can't. :-)
Serafina - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
I know the original song well; I was in high school when it came out. And the parody was great too; I also like how the rhymed words are so close to the corresponding rhymes of the original. 5-5-5 for you. Have a nice day, Arwen! :)
Arwen - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, K1 and Serafina!!
Ashkicksass - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
I love it! Perfect, and oh so funny. You're not going to believe this, but when I was in 10th grade I broke my tooth on a breadstick. You heard it right, a soft delicious breadstick. I still haven't figured it out...
Arwen - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Darling! I did actually break a tooth on a gumball when I was in college...but not while I was on a date...and it was a molar...so nobody could tell the difference...except for my dentist!
Stuart McArthur - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
this is my first DKTOS of yours Arwen, so I had to read it like a story - and I pissed myself (a guy who know your friend Sue!) (some bubble fun was my intent) (confection seemed foolproof) - you have a sublime take on the mundane - oh and you're cool and lovely too - 555
Agrimorfee - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Arwen, you are one of the better storytellers in this gang of weirdos. Nice use of DM. 555
Arwen - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Stuart...uh...not that I'm counting or anything...but...it's not your first DKTOS of mine...check the record:

http://www.amiright.com/parody/2000s/leeannwomack2.shtml

Remember that part about me always being right...=)

Anyway...I really didn't know how many folks would KTOS...it's not as mainstream as most of the other songs I choose...but...when inspiration calls...I have to answer. Thanks for loving me enough to give me a 555 regardless...mmmmwah!

And Agri...I don't think I could be more flattered! What a lovely thing to say, considering the talented company that we keep around here...thanks!
Kristof Robertson - January 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Well babe, I KTOS alot...in fact it's one of my faves...and this was yet again a stirling parody....you really do get into some fixes, dontcha? 555
Arwen - January 08, 2005 - Report this comment
Oh Kristof...nothing like a little S.A.B. charm to make a little girl blush...=) Thanks, Love!
Stuart McArthur - January 08, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm not sure whether to be disappointed that our "I'm-always-right"/"No-I'M-always-right" debate line-in-the-sand has edged some inches into your territory
or to be thrilled (and excited) at your depth of knowledge regarding our history
excuse me while I go and jump to conclusions :-)
Arwen - January 08, 2005 - Report this comment
I make a point of remembering our every exchange, darling. It makes it easier when we have to fight...er...disagree.
Stuart McArthur - January 08, 2005 - Report this comment
Yes, it does make fighting easier - but a big tub of mud would make it easier still - what do you think?
Arwen - January 08, 2005 - Report this comment
Surprisingly you're not the first to make said suggestion...but I prefer Lime Jell-o...

...to each his or her own, I guess.
Stuart McArthur - January 08, 2005 - Report this comment
yeah, either is okay - it's just that when I'm wrestling in jell-o I tend to do more eating than wrestling - but whatever makes you happy I guess
Arwen - January 10, 2005 - Report this comment
That's actually a little bit grosser than I'd like to think about.
Lee O. Jay - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Wish I KTOS, but very funny nonetheless...
Arwen - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Love!
Scathe - February 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Ow!Ow!Ow! I can actually imagine the pain. Nice work.
Agrimorfee - February 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) see above
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - February 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Gums and gum don't mix, sister. I loved 'bicuspid gore', I hope you're gunna be sedated prior to dental surgery! ;)
Adagio - February 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS....good read..5's
Arwen - February 09, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Scathe, Agri, Luke & Adagio!
Claude Prez - February 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Hmm, the only thing worse than visiting the dentist would be having to listen to Depeche Mode at the same time. Still, some excellent rhymes plus it mentions Heath which is my fave so GREAT JOB.
Rick D - February 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Just got back from the dentist in time to read this.DKOS, but good tale
Kristof Robertson - February 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Just have a look at my vote posting to know what I think of this...:-)
Adam Eccleshall - February 12, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS, and rather frustratingly, can't find a midi with an obvious vocal substitute track to hum along to :-/

Great lyrics, though :-) 5's
John Jenkins - February 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Well done, Arwen. Very good rhyming and I particularly liked the evil spell line.
Phil Alexander - February 20, 2005 - Report this comment
Seeing as I DKTOS, I kept wanting to sing "A Gumball Broke My Tooth" to the tune of "A DJ Saved My Life" (a dire song - don't know if it got to that side of the Atlantic)... tell me, did you write this one at 2:30?
Spaff.com - February 20, 2005 - Report this comment
I listened along with the original while reading this (which I'd love to do with every song parody, but alas). Nice job, Sister. Your rhyming so many end syllables with the OS's is quite a bonus. I dig how you worked in "Never again" and I agree with everyone else on the "evil spell" line. Also, Claude's comment is hilarious but I gotta admit that I really like the Violator album (whence cometh "Personal Jesus" and this OS).
Johnny D - February 21, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Sweet...and gory!
Arwen - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
How did I get so behind on this one??

Because I'm lazy tonight...thanks to all of my SOTM commenters...and...

Claude: LOL!

Phil: Yes, "DJ" did make it over...I actually like it, silly!
Ethan Mawyer - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM - I DKTOS and don't have a downloading program but i trusted everyone else and didn't ruin the perfect score. After all, i don't want to incur the wrath of the elf
Arwen - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Look how smart you are, Ethan! ; ) Thanks!
Ash - February 23, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM DKTOS (>.<)
Jeff Reuben - February 23, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM--Still well done!
Arwen - February 24, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Ash & Jeff!
Stuart McArthur - February 26, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM - already commented (a lot, I see) - and seconded...mostly...
Tim Mayfield - February 26, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) The dentist will want $555 bucks now.
MysteryGoat - February 27, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS
2nz - February 28, 2005 - Report this comment
Damn, don't know this OS. But rhymes were charming and bloody. Kinda makes me miss hockey... good work, O sexy one.
Red Ant - April 01, 2005 - Report this comment
555. LOL finally a song from Arwen I know!
Arwen - May 18, 2005 - Report this comment
I've seriously fallen asleep at the wheel on a LOT of my thank yous...=(

2nz...you just let me know when your next hockey game is...(as I'm sure you'll take it up again sooner or later)...and I will come cheer you on. =)

Red Ant...I was wondering why you were missing from all my comment threads...; ) Thanks!
Kate - March 28, 2006 - Report this comment
I couldn't even finish reading this because I was cracking up so much. It was awesome! And it went perfectly with the original song. Great job!

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