I took him out "Duke Nukem",
When I got bored I tried a new one,
So then I popped in "Quake",
And I was doing great,
But then I turned on the TV,

And that's when I was told there's something wrong with me,
It's people like me who ruin society,
But I'm still more amused by video games,
What it the heck is code 19?,
And where's the exit to this maze,
What's this stage again?,
What's this stage again?,

And later on on the internet,
I flirted wrong with some hot brunette,
I told her all the chicks,
Go for my taped-up specs,
And I was hot as hot could be,

And that's about the time that she quit on me,
I'll be a virgin when I'm 93,
And I'm still more amused by getting girl friends,
Hey Lara Croft babe you and me,
Maybe this is just a passing phase,
What's this stage again?,
What's this stage again?,

And that's when my computer shut down on me,
I finally had the mystic goblin's key,
But I'm still more amused by winning "Pong",
What does the heck does "game over" mean?,
It's how I deal with inner rage,
What's this stage again?,
What's this stage again?,

And that's about the time that I broke down inside,
Fogged up my glasses 'cause I had to cry,
Got no interaction with outside life,
Heck I've never even been outside,
But this is how I'll spend all my days,
What's this stage again?,
What's this stage again?,