I never thought, I'd write a song
That would be popular for so long
I know four chords on my guitar
And wonder how I even got half this far
I wrote some riffs, with just three notes
Because they told me not to play solos
Im too famous to learn more
I've never been to a music store

I won't be famous for a year
I wouldn't call this a career
Acting just like I am five
I'm playing video games inside
The bus is wide, but we can't drive
Even though I'm like 25
I couldn't wait to write more songs
About the time when I !@#$%* your mom.

I never thought, I'd write a song
With more than six notes with my friend Tom
And full of words, like 'fart' and 'turd'
I won't even mention the other words
So turn it off, shut it up,
Remember how much we want to suck
And apple juice gets me drunk
I've got a whole crate inside my trunk

I won't be famous for a year
I wouldn't call this a career
Acting just like I am five
I'm playing video games inside
The bus is wide, but we can't drive
Even though I'm like 25
I couldn't wait to write more songs
About the time when I !@#$%* your mom.

(this is the part where the music builds up and
there's a one-note piano solo)

I won't be famous for a year
We tell you what you want to hear
Drinking juice and five-alive
Even though I'm like 25
The bus is wide, I still can't drive
The tour is over, so's my life
I cant wait till I get home
So I can watch Shrek and Home Alone