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Song Parodies -> "Billy Ray's Movie Theme Tunes, No. 2: Speed"

Original Song Title:

"Achy Breaky Heart"

Original Performer:

Billy Ray Cyrus

Parody Song Title:

"Billy Ray's Movie Theme Tunes, No. 2: Speed"

Parody Written by:

Kristof Robertson

The Lyrics

Y'all want some MORE Billy Ray? No? Well, is gonna git some anyways! Part 2 of a series
Truck is in the shopand so I thought I'd hop
On the number 3 to Malibu
But now the driver's shot(essential to the plot)
And my life's in the hands of Keanu!

Some crazy with a grudgegave Mr Reeves a nudge
And said, "There's lotsa folks that might get blown.(up!)"
It surely ain't ideal, coz Bullock's at the wheel
And I was hopin' they'd get Sharon Stone

I'm on a busa nervy swervy bus
And there's explosives underneath
And if we slow the busthe nervy swervy bus
There won't be nuthin' left but teeth!

[INSTRUMENTAL BREAK, during which.]
"So who's the psycho?...Dennis freakin' HOPPER? Maaan! He's always been crazywe're in DEEP sh"

As the tyres burnI'm fairly dang concerned
Coz LA public transport's NEVER fast
My face is turnin' paleI hear the sirens wail
But just saw O.J. Simpson speedin' past!

I called my Uncle Bradand said "Tell Mom and Dad
To feed my dawg in case I end up dead"
But then I had to staregraffiti on a chair
Said "Dude, you shoulda stuck with Bill & Ted"

I'm on a busa nervy swervy bus
On my demise, you'd have to bet
Coz Reeves can't stop the busthe nervy swervy bus
Bu-llet time ain't invented yet

[INSTRUMENTAL BREAKplayed at 50 mph]

Trapped on a busa nervy swervy bus
And Sandra's gittin' purdy stressed
She's gone a little nutson nervy swervy bus
I'm prayin' she'll start to undress

Bummed on this busthis nervy swervy bus
I've finished off my stash o' booze
Keanu's such a wusson nervy swervy bus
They shoulda got Willis or Cruise!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 28

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   1
 4   1
 5   25

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rick C - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
EXCELLENT ALL AROUND, Kristof! There are some fantastic lines in here. SOTM-worthy if I ever did see one. 555+++
alvin rhodes - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
fave of the day
Meriadoc - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Never watched the movie and always avoided the OS, but you crafted this so well I could follow it anyway. Excellent!
John Barry - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
A lovely tribute to the greatest thespian of our, and perhaps any time.
AFW - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
I hated that movie and sequels...but love this very humerous parody
Arwen - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
LOL!! I love this one...even more than the Titanic!
Stuart McArthur - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
essential to the plot, OJ Simpson, Bill and Ted, starting to undress - brilliant brilliant brilliant - 555
TJC - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Just great.. particularly the 'bullet time' , Bill & Ted and the Dennis Hopper lines! I see you aren't letting your parody bus drop below 555 MPH!
Kristof Robertson - August 19, 2006 - Report this comment
A big thanks to Rick, Al, Merry, JAB (he is, isn't he?), AFW, Arwen, Stu, and TJC. One or two more "Billy Ray"s to come....
Michael Pacholek - August 19, 2006 - Report this comment
This parody moves better than the bus, and a LOT better than the script!
Red Ant - August 19, 2006 - Report this comment
TJC already picked out my favorite lines. 555
Peregrin - August 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent !
Jonathan - August 28, 2006 - Report this comment
WOW!!! purdy funny! a course I never seen THIS movie "I did however see titanic" but this is another good one 4's keep 'em comin'
The Charnstar - September 02, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Whoa, nervy swervy bus... Sounds... nervy and... swervy... 5-5-5, plus that poster you did, SHEER GENIOUS! LOL! 5-5-5 for that too.. I know I can't vote for it but... Just imagine I did - September 07, 2006 - Report this comment
Nervy! Swervy! Encore! Encore!
Agrimorfee - September 12, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) As Keanu would say, --"WHOA!" I didn't get the point about stanza #5, but it was otherwise excellent.
Matthias - September 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Can't believe I didn't vote on this one yet... I know I read it.... Oh well.... This was one DIEHARD parody....
Chris Bodily TM - September 17, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Wow... This one definitely belongs in my Top Five this month. It has all the essentials of a great disaster-movie parody. If (Bleep) (Bleep) Snakes on a Plane doesn' win this month, Nervy Swervy Bus should. 555
Cat - September 17, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) How odd that you should see two parodies based on Keanu Reeves movies in the same SOTM! Anywho, this was great. Definitely a lot of great lines.
wannabemustangjockey - September 18, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) That bus will be skidding long before this parody does!
Jack Wilson - September 22, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) "Dude you shoula stuck with Bill and Ted"=one ofm y fav lines in a parody ever, LOL gerat job! 555!
Tim Mayfield - September 24, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I guess I missed the bus on this one. Not what I'd expect from Kristof, but maybe it's just me. I wanted to be floored and expected more than was delivered. I guess that's my fault.
Johnny D - September 25, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) "nervy swervy" ... yeah ... yeah, that's the ticket! :-D
Rick C - September 25, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) So, are you going to play guitar, bass and piano on the recording?
bobpiecheese - September 26, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Thank you for recapping a movie I've never seen in my life...and reminding me to get off my ass and start recording, as Rick just mentioned.
Michael McVey - September 26, 2006 - Report this comment
I can tell you haven't ridden any busses in Lima. 5's anyway. -- MM
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - September 27, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM - Speed Of The Month or maybe Speed Of The Mouth. :-)
Stuart McArthur - September 28, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) know this like the back of my hand now, KR, from trying to sing it and getting all the emphases right - still crack up at the "starting to undress" line
Jeff Reuben - September 30, 2006 - Report this comment
You can never get enough Billy Ray! Nice job with the movie parody!
Rick C - March 04, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) As I said above, excellent parody. Fun to sing along with the OS.
Below Average Dave - March 05, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) Honestly. . .can't stand the OS. . .can't stand it. . .may have to parody it too insult it, but then Weird Al kinda already did that. . .and that would mean I'd have to learn it to parody it. Kristof, You have a natrual talent of writing. . .and while there are many great writers on this site, you are probably the best at overall pacing, comedy and general theme. While this is not my favorite parody of yours because I've seen some parodies by you that make Weird Al look lame, this one is still among the better part of the site, and while in honesty, there is another one by you I saw further down the list that will likely keep this one off the top 7, it's still a great parody by a great parodist.
Matthias - March 15, 2007 - Report this comment
Still a "Matrix" of fives.... Damn Keanu Reeves sucks, but this rocks
wannabemustangjockey - March 23, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTY - My comment from SOTM still stands. Mind you, I haven't ridden on any busses since...
Red Ant - March 23, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) Still a most excellent work here, Kristof. You nailed the movie, man. At least Reeves had decency to sit out Speed 2: Snooze Control.

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