I went to a shrink, now I won't make a stink
Every time things do not go my way
I was quite insane, and such a royal pain
But I will be a calmer queen today

And you can be real late, for an important date
You can even paint the roses tan
I will be real lax if you don't pay a tax
Nowadays I only have one command


Don't steal my tarts, my bakey flakey tarts
You know that's something that I dread
And if you steal my tarts, my bakey flakey tarts
I might just say ¨off with your head¨

You can call me fat, I'm not bothered by that
You can say my husband is real short
Yeah you can even say, that hedgehogs in croquet
Is not the proper way to play the sport

Tell the Cheshire cat, and that nut with the hat
That from me they do not have much to fear
But if you're a crook, and my great tarts you took
You'd better not show your face around here

Yeah don't steal my tarts, my bakey flakey tarts
You know that's something that I dread
And if you steal my tarts, my bakey flakey tarts
I might just say ¨off with your head¨