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Song Parodies -> "Cartman"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Alice In Chains

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

This was a pretty challanging song, and it took me about a week to pull it off... Here's the Youtube Video:
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

I’m a big-boned guy
Cheesey Poofs and pie
Problem, I’ll agree
Drank my friend Kenny

Cartman, Cartman, Cartman

Lie, cheat, swear and steal
I shout and sneer
“Suck meh balls”
You will quite likely hear

Mom… Is a hermaphrodite
In… This here South Park, alright

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

Ask and mom will buy
My greed isn’t shy
Kyle needs kidneys
Well… He can’t have these

Cartman, Cartman, Cartman


My wait for the Wii is nowhere near
So I’ll freeze myself until it’s here

In the future! But why?
Damn Butters go frickin die!

I mock and offend
All my crappy friends
Battles they have fought
All due to my fault

(Very Softly Spoken In The Background)
I live in a small mountain town that’s strange and bizarre
Towlie’s high to make him smart
Each day is the death of Kenny
I got a probed rectum from invasion
That’s how things are in South Park
(Construction papery)
When Stan learns he’ll come talk
“You know I learned today…”
It’s the same shtick

(End of the softly spoken stuff)

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah

Evil mastermind
Hitler I enshrined
Pissed off at mankind
On parents you’ve dined

Cartman, Cartman, Cartman

Weight Gain 4000 enlarged my rear
Ginger kids are gross my biggest fear

I… Once saved Terrance and Phil
Dude… This here South Park’s a thrill
Here's also a site to with all of your favorite "South Park" episodes...

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Kristof Robertson - November 05, 2007 - Report this comment
"Respec' meh authoritah!"...and take these 5s. Cheesy poofs...hehehe
Agrimorfee - November 07, 2007 - Report this comment
Parodying Alice In Chains is a lot like Kyle's mom, if you catch my drift. 555
Red Ant - November 08, 2007 - Report this comment
You guys are hella lame. Just kidding. Another excellent Sickman parody. The outro wails could be Cartman going "mah". Two minor pacing blips, but still outstanding. 5s. Now screw you guys, I'm going home!
Matthias - November 08, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Kristof, Aggy (Heh, heh, heh... I agree), and Red Ant (I noticed that as I was parodying it that the wailing in this parody actually does sound like Cartman... It's creepy, but it works really well).
Below Average Dave ( - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Well, the original strangely kinda sounds like Cartman. . .Agru, great pun. Though not all Alice in Chains songs are that bad to parody. . .this one seemed like a biach. . .um, Matthias you did a great job on this parody, the only complaint I have is having to listen to this OS (which I won't hold in my judging) Sorry Red Ant;) Not my favorite Alice in Chains song. . .
bobpiecheese - November 20, 2007 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Excellent work, Matthias! Le'ts celebrate by singing a song. How about...'Kyle's Mom is a Stupid B*tch' in D minor'. Weeeeeeeeeeeeell...[you get the picture]
Rex - November 21, 2007 - Report this comment
Fun retrospective for those who know the show.

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