Song Parodies -> Reindeer Dinners

Original Song Title:

"TV Dinners"

Original Performer:

ZZ Top

  
Parody Song Title:

"Reindeer Dinners"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

-Let me tell you why you're reading this. You're reading this because you know something. What you know, you can't explain, but you feel it, you felt it your entire life, that there's something wrong with the world, you don't know what it is, but it's there. You can feel it when you go to work, or when you go to church or when you pay your credit card bills. It's as if the world has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth, that you are a slave, and like everyone else, you were born into bondage, born inside a prison that you cannot smell, taste, or touch, a prison for your mind. Do you know what I'm talking about?

-The Matrix?

-No, that's a different set of allegories altogether, what I'm talking about is Christmas! Have you ever thought about what kind of muscles Santa's reindeers would need to go around the whole world in just one night? Have you ever pondered how much protein and hormone stacked meat it would take to build those muscles? Have you ever contemplated why Santa keeps a naughty list when he's said to be FOR the other kind of kids, the nice ones, with low hormone levels? Have you ever wondered about what the REAL purpose of the naughty list might be? Have you ever ruminated over what it is that makes Rudolph's nose all red?

-Gasp! Gulp!
Reindeer dinners, a naughty kind of meat
Reindeer dinners, a vicious kind of treat

Give them the finger and they'll have your hand
They'll gnaw at your behaviour and Santa's in command

Oh, Yeah!

Reindeer dinners, they're boeing-ing the sled
Reindeer dinners, they're making Santa red

Seven year old Turks among eleven year old Finns
It fuels them like Gomorrah or a pimp that's selling twins

Oh, Yeah!

Reindeer dinners, so kneel if you have huffed
Reindeer dinners, Rudolph's never stuffed

Know that Intifada kids make teriyaki stew
They even like you quickened if the sauce's not from a shrew

And you'll whine in brine
If you have no spine
It will feed 'em
Give 'em airborne chow
© Peter Andersson. (No, I don't plan a trilogy, but I never say never).
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Pacing: 5.0
 
How Funny: 5.0
 
Overall Rating: 5.0
 

Total Votes: 1
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Red Ant - December 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Well, I now know TOS. Good parody here but I think your intro topped the parody itself. As for your questions, I ponder those all the time and I think I have the answers: Big muscles would be a plus, the lack of build up of lactic acid would be much more helpful. A lot of meat. That one can't be answered on open forum, too naughty. Same as previous answer. Rudolph's nose is red because that is the cheapest color of paint available. That or Strontium-90 poisoning from Chernobyl.
Larry Hensley - December 06, 2005 - Report this comment
mmmmmmmmm.......... reindeer..........Oh, their dinners.........5s
Peter Andersson - December 10, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanx Red Ant and Larry. I'll have to agree that the intro turned out better than the actual parody, and longer too. :-)

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