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Song Parodies -> "King of Stains"

Original Song Title:

"King of Pain"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Police

Parody Song Title:

"King of Stains"

Parody Written by:

Jan Unwin

The Lyrics

Inspired by a former person in my life.
There's a little brown spot on his shorts today
It's the same old stain as yesterday
There's some black crap stuck on his t-shirt too
Not sure what that is attached to his shoe

(Chorus)
He has stood here before in the pouring rain
But the downpour won't wash off his stubborn stains
I guess I'm always hoping that he'll end my pain
But it's his destiny to be the king of stains

There's a little brown spot on his shorts today
(That's his underwear)
It's the same old stain as yesterday
(I guess he don't care)
There's some black crap stuck on his t-shirt too
(One he shouldn't wear)
He's got on some pants covered with some goo
(Lord, don't take me there)

(Repeat Chorus)

He has socks that can stand up against the wall
(Walking on their own)
Smells like dead salmon left out since last Fall
(Rotten to the bone)
There's some last week's dinner still on his shirt
(Don't remember cooking that)
Looks like he's been wallowing in the dirt
(Toss out your welcome mat)

(Repeat Chorus)

When I see him I want to tear my own eyes out
He's the smelliest man on the block, no doubt
There's never a doubt when he's around
Reminds me of Pig Pen on Charlie Brown
King of stains
Hasn't had a shower in a month or two
(Time for him to go)
There is nothing more that I can do
(Buster, hit the road)
There's a little brown spot on his shorts today
It's the same old stain as yesterday
He has stood here before in the pouring rain
But the downpour won't wash off his stubborn stains
I guess I always thought he could end this reign
But it's his destiny to be the king of stains
King of stains
King of stains
King of stains
He'll always be king of stains

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Johnny D - December 20, 2003 - Report this comment
Well-crafted, and deliciously nauseating.
Paul Robinson - January 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Jan, can't believe this has been up since at least Dec. 20th and only had ONE VOTE before mine. This is really a super job! To bloviate, punctuate, flatulate, bloat and expand on Johnny D's comments I have to say this crap really flows out in total stynck, I mean sync with the original. OH, and I'm very glad to hear that this was about a "FORMER" person in your life.
Paul Robinson - March 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Jan - I meant to go vote on one of yours that I missed when you first posted it. Saw this only had two votes and figured it a likely candidate. Little did I know I was 1 of the 2...SO HEY, FOLKS! This is a funny parody!!! Johnny D & I are the only votes on this December posting. Well, good...uhh...morning...gonna crash.
Jan Unwin - March 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Paul, thanks for revisiting this parody. I'm glad you like it.
David Chrenko - March 18, 2004 - Report this comment
You're right, Paul - this is a soon to be discovered gem. A pox upon my house, Jan. I don't know how I missed this one first time around. I'll just have to make it up to you with the gift of 5s.
Jan Unwin - March 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks David. Pox....hmm, I'll have to see if there are any chicken pox songs done already. I remember when my little brother had chicken pox. He would pick the scabs off and then hide them on top of the mirror in the living room.

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